Today, my boyfriend and I were making love for the first time, when out of nowhere my cat meowed from the doorway. My boyfriend sighed, pulled out, and exasperatedly called me a selfish bitch for not having put my cat outside. FML
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Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. As we were getting into it, his cat came into the room, sat, and stared us down with what looked like disapproving eyes. After 5 minutes had gone by, we stopped completely. A cat just cockblocked me. FML
Today, my boyfriend got irrationally pissed at me because his cat decided to sit on my lap instead of his. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when we heard a screech. My two cats were having it harder than us. FML
Today, I visited my girlfriend at her place, one thing lead to another, and we had sex for the first time. Her normally very sweet cat now hisses and savages me if I so much as look at him. FML
Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. As I was leaving his house, I heard him shout, "Hey! Wait! Sweetie, get back here!" He was talking to his cat who'd run out the door behind me. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were starting to do the deed and she started popping zits on my chest. Then she said that I was killing the mood because my cat was meowing. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML
Today, after struggling to fall asleep due to stress, my cat decided to wake me up by standing on me and meowing until I got up. Just for me to show him that my boyfriend had already put food in his dish. FML
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Top comments
Airman1988 9
If that's all it takes to break his concentration he has a lot of disappointment heading his way for the future, what an ass
whyusofat 17
Pretty sure thats what you call "pussy problems".
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Comments (189)
Iknoweverything 29
I'm going to go against the whole "break up with him" trend and say YDI. The least you could have done is shut the ******* door so that the cat wasn't a problem. (I presume it was, since the cat meowed from the doorway.) There is nothing worse than having sex, and getting interrupted by a goddamn animal. Get over yourself, quit being a selfish bitch, and put the ******* animal outside. (Anyone who hates this comment has never endured the horror of house-pets interrupting sex.)
kimpe 6
Yes, let's put the cat outside, where it can be hurt by other animals, hit by cars, get lost, etc. OP's boyfriend is a selfish dick. If he can't ignore a meowing cat and gets mad at it, there's something wrong with him.
gracehi 33
Youknownothing
DocBastard 40
I can't tell if you A) are trolling, B) are being sarcastic, or C) are actually a giant asshole shaped like a human who somehow learned to read and write.
glittercookies 12
Are you OP's boyfriend?
tvhsprodigy 3
Wow.. What a jerk!
grapes678yourmom 1
Hahaha!!!
jennifernorvell 7
**** that. Dump his ass
DustyStorm 16
What an insensitive asshole! I wouldn't put up with that shit at all! No **** is worth that kind behavior....move on, you can do so much better. And you two weren't making love.... Sorry
videokid2000 10
If you neuter your cat, it will make sure you can't have sex either.
thisbitchlys 0
I hate when people automatically say "dump his/her ass" honestly you shouldn't dump somebody for something like this.
gracehi 33
Yes, you definitely should. This is the FIRST time they've had sex, and he called her a bitch because a cat meowed. That is absolutely RIDICULOUS! Problems in the beginning of a relationship only get worse as time goes on. This early behavior is a sign of things to come. Trust me. I know.
gracehi 33
I wish I had paid attention to your name and read your profile before I commented. I might have benefited from their wisdom before I wasted my time. :/
mdds 2
he's gay a straight man wouldn't stop even if the cat licked his ass.
makymama 0
Ditch that loser!!
perdix 31
He's got to focus on the task at hand. A real man would keep pumping away even if your pet mama grizzly roared in the doorway.
DespairFaction 11
Won't stop can't stop till the job is done.