Today, I went out to eat. When I walked into the restaurant, a lady approached me and said she'd seat me soon. After a long wait, I saw that same lady leave. Then I realized she didn't actually work there and was just screwing with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML
Today, I was sitting in McDonald's. A lady came up to me and started complaining about the bad service, and asked for the manager. I told her that I didn't work there. "But you must, someone that fat has to work here!" FML
Today, I went out to eat at a restaurant. When the waitress saw me, she continously told me how beautiful and kind I was. Flattered, I just said thank you. Five minutes later, one of the ugliest girls I've ever seen in my life walked in. The waitress told her the same exact things she told me. FML
Today, a woman came up to me at work and screamed at me for "taking forever" to come and wait at her table. I work at Wendy's. FML
Today, I must've misinterpreted the waitress when she said, "First come, first served." FML
Today, at work, I got to wait on one of those tables where everyone had very complex orders, and some of them sent their food back. When the time finally came for me to bring them their check and receive my well-earned tip, I returned only to discover that they'd dined and dashed. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to Outback Steakhouse. We went to one outside of town because my wife works at our local one. When we got there, guess who we saw? I forgot she transferred to another location, which just happened to be this one. Goddamit. FML
Today, I was eating at Steak N' Shake. I noticed that the cute waitress was checking me out. When I was done with my meal she wrote her number on the ticket. So, as I was walking out the door, I turned around to wave at her, and walked into a metal bar next to the door. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
Today, I'm a waitress. A customer came in and acted very kindly and even mentioned how I was such a help to her. She also mentioned leaving a nice tip. The tip? A fake $20. Thanks. FML
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Top comments
Cads1 24
You have to admit, that was pretty clever and funny.
weveallbeenthere 30
trolling at its finest.
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Comments (63)
angelic_avenger 7
Officially added to my bucket list of shit to pull.
Malecent 13
Its so ******* stupid how you people are. If it was a dude you'd be saying **** him and he's a dick. ******* double standards.
praesidiem 16
People like you, are the reason Xanax should be an OTC drug.
sdroze1389 31
I have mixed feelings on that. while xan helps with uptight people, I take it medically for panic. I don't think think everyone needs it. he does have a point on double standards though
quackImapenguin 16
Pretty sure people would react the same if it was a dude. Actually, they might be even more okay with it considering that people tend to annoyingly find the same jokes funnier when it's a dude making them.
IndefiniteBeauty 17
????????
morganshea 16
Sorry OP, but that's actually pretty funny! Hope your food was good though!
devinaww 15
chase that woman down and make her give you a table! I'm jk, FYL, and get trolled :)
xrudeboyrock 29
no staff realized you were waiting?
VHBJ 13
Yes I eventually did eat it was a good place so that is the main reason I stayed and it seemed mildly busy
DevilsMetsGiants 30
Troll level: Expert
kpoakes 20
Hmm. Doing something like that seems like a pretty sad way to amuse yourself in my opinion. FYL OP, I'd be weirded out in that situation. Not angry, not amused, just weirded out.
MostDope_fml 7
GOT EM!!!!! - Deez Nuts guy