Today, my girlfriend dumped me for another guy. Last week, she wrote sweet things like "Love you forever" and "Light of my life" on my arm cast. I have to wait two more weeks until it's taken off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for the tattoo artist who gave us our matching "love" tattoos. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for someone else. An hour earlier I had just gotten permission from her dad to propose. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who I’ve been madly in love with for 18 months, left me for some guy she met two weeks ago. I was planning to propose to her next week. FML
Today, my girlfriend gave me a two week notice for our relationship. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend broke up with me. Tomorrow he should be getting the super long love letter that I poured my heart into and sent him a week ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend of six months broke up with me. In her words, “Liking you fucked up my brain.” Later that afternoon, she posted a story of her with another dude’s arm around her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by putting a Post-it note on my locker that said, "Consider yourself dumped." FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, and totally forgot about my existence. She doesn’t even text me, and I think there’s someone else, but she has my name tattooed on her body. Love sucks, I don’t recommend it. FML
Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML
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Top comments
emirie 21
Cross it off so you don't have to look at it.
golden_warrior 23
Damn, lifetime is a day for hoes
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Comments (64)
gracehi 33
And we thought it was just tattoos that jinxed a relationship.
perdix 31
When you get better, break that other ******'s arm, so she'll write cute stuff on his cast and then dump him for you. Plan to leave town 6-8 weeks later.
Sports_guy3 28
Here are many cities available: 1. FarFarAway 2. Timbuktu 3. AnywhereButThere 4. NYC 5. WhereYourMomLives Happy traveling!
Bumblebrea99 14
Scribble it out! Thats what the giant sharpies are for!
livilaughs 12
I cried at the hospital when I hated my cast (it was too tight) they removed it and put another on... worth a go?
junkman6 22
Or OP can just dunk it in water and say there was an accident. The doctors have to change the cast out if it gets wet. Plenty of ways to make em change casts out.
awkwardloveannie 28
that should count as torture.. maybe she planned it out
seth7_ 22
That must have hurt worse than when you broke/sprained your arm.
breakinlegs 19
at least it wasn't a tattoo!
Zebediabolical 45
You know that you can just get a marker and cover it all up, don't you? Better a couple of black rectangles than lies from you ex.
jman26 11
Karma will get her
FrankHotpants 31
Just do what the military does for every mistake that's made, one line it and initial.