Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML
Today, today while walking my dog in a different part of town, a man ran screaming out of his house, and threw a plastic bag at me. It was dog poop. It was the first time I'd ever walked in front of his house with my dog. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when, as usual, he did his business in the grass and stepped off to the side. I squatted and reached for the bag when my dog spotted another canine. He lunged forward in excitement and I landed face forward in the feces. FML
Today, I was taking my dog for a walk and forgot a bag to pick up his poop, since it's illegal to not pick it up in my town. Right as my dog started to take a dump, a cop car drove by and continued to watch me as I was forced to pick up the poop with my bare hands. FML
Today, while walking my dog, we came across two men having a heated argument in the street. My dog decided the perfect place to poop was right next to them. He wouldn't budge no matter what. Meanwhile, one of the men pulled a knife, and I practically shat myself. FML
Today, I wanted revenge on my neighbor, whose dog craps in my yard, so I spent a day at the dog park gathering up dog shit. I piled it up by the property line and ran over it with the mower, intending to spray his driveway and car with turds. Instead, it gummed up the mower. Now it stinks too bad to fix. FML
Today, while walking my dog, I saw a hot guy so I tried to look chill. My dog chose that exact moment to take an enormous dump. I didn’t have any bags. The dude stared while I pretended to check my phone until he walked off. FML
Today, I stepped into a pile of dog shit on my doorstep, along with a note saying, "Keep your dog out of my yard." I don't own a dog. FML
Today, I was walking my dog when he decided to poop in the middle of a crosswalk during heavy traffic. We have very strict laws (and fines) so I frantically tried to pick it up while cars waited, honking and watching me struggle like I was in the worst street performance ever. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
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Top comments
Matty1188 6
Maybe you should be responsible and carry a bag or two with you when you walk your dog.
Timbits93 1
must have been a crappy situation
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Comments (255)
lovingmylife84 0
why with your bare hands, you had a bag with you (unless you're an inconsiderate asshole) Oooh I see, you ARE. not an FML, just getting what you deserve.
rhpsfan9 10
Carry some bags with u next time. Make sure u wash your hands, hah
Frenchface 0
well that is why people invented poop bags lol sorry to hear about that haha
xxmichaelxx 0
you dumb bitch why didn't you ask him for a bag
OMFGitschris 3
LMFAO!!! :D
randomreader2315 4
Next time bring bags, you ******* douche. I ******* HATE inconsiderate dog owners that allow their dog(s) to crap everywhere with no intention to pick it up. I'm NOT understanding why these douchebags are sympathizing with you. If you don't like picking up dog shit, don't own a ******* dog. Simple as that.
SnailJamsss 6
Can you shut the **** up already.
j_cat187 20
wish i saw that smoke ur poo cigar
darkmis1 18
YDI for assuming it would be alright to let your dog shit on someone's lawn and just leave it without cleaning it up. In some places it's law, but even when it's not, it's just common curtosey. YDI.
creedaddict 9
you couldn't ask the person for a bag or something .. wow
amandrinoranges 0
omg hahahahah that's ******* great I laughed to hard