Today, I allowed my five-year old daughter to paint my fingernails during a living-room "picnic" we were having. A while later I got called back in to work for an emergency meeting. When I arrived at the meeting I noticed my fingernails were still neon-green. I am a 40-year old man. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a call from my 14-year-old step-daughter while I was out. She'd left nail polish in her pocket when she'd tried to wash the clothes. I now have hot pink streaks on most of my work clothes. FML
Today, I was with a wedding party getting manicures. I absentmindedly used a freshly-painted nail to pick my nose and ended up with two beauticians scraping indestructible bright red gel varnish out of my left nostril with acetone soaked q-tips, while everyone sat waiting in complete silence. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought this hot pink Chanel nail polish. Bored, she thought it would be funny to paint my nails. I finally gave in and let her paint my toe nails. After she left, my buddy calls to to see if I can give him a ride. I forgot I had a swim meet today. FML
Today, I was told that I was a terrible mother, I was ruining my daughter’s life and that I was raising her to be promiscuous. Why? Because I'd painted my 2-year-old’s fingernails. FML
Today, I got bored on the toilet and decided to paint my nails. I ended up having to wait half an hour to wipe. FML
Today, I awoke to make-up all over my face and nail polish on my hands and feet because my daughter wanted "daddy to look pretty." I have a job interview in an hour and none of it is coming off. FML
Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML
Today, the woman giving me a manicure found a booger under one of my fingernails. FML
Today, on the first day of my nanny job, I wanted to impress my employers with how trustworthy and responsible I am. During the sixty seconds that I went to pee, the two-year-old found a black Sharpie and scribbled all over the wall. Nail polish remover made it ten times worse. FML
Today, I went to get my nails done for the first time in a while. I don't like to go that much because two of my toes are connected, and I'm very self-conscious about it. The man painting my toes started laughing when he saw them and called all the other employees over to look. FML
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Top comments
AlphaC 0
You have a five year old daughter. That immediately exempts you from being called gay or unmanly. You're not gay/unmanly because you have neon-green fingernails. You're a parent of a five year old daughter. Cheer up, it's not THAT bad.
justme001 0
Hey, it means you participate in your kid's life. Good for you, eff anyone who would say otherwise.
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Comments (321)
pinkbubble96 0
aww thx for bein good daddy! the world needs more of those.
anniesaysbueno 0
you are a good father (: besides, neon colors are all the rage.
motto_fml 0
thats adorable though... how many fathers would allow their daughters to paint their nails? hey... at least all the ladies on FML think your a great father
myang 0
aww.. this is adorable...
jonathanpatric 0
I think this is cute :) This shows your dedication to your investments.
live1laugh2love3 0
i didnt click FYL or YDI because its totally sweet of her..so not FYL and you did nothing wrong..sonot YDI it put a smile on my face
alijacket 0
That's adorable and totally understandable. Anyone that thinks otherwise is... well, an idiot. Neon nailpolish? A tiny, harmless thing that made your daughter happy. I suppose it'd be a FML if you had a douche of a boss and got fired. But, since that's not the case... keep on painting those nails. :)
RyeBreadBoy 0
i think you sound like a good father. i think everybody probably does embarassing stuff for their kids at some point. at least you're involved in her life. and to all the homophobes: i'm pretty sure most gay guys aren't out painting their nails and putting on makeup and stuff. if anything, that'd be cross-dressing, which is something totally different. jesus, i'm not even gay and i know this. get some tolerance.
cactus_fml 0
Awww, that's really sweet. Sure, you probably looked a little fruity but they probably knew you didn't pain them yourself. Go you for being a good dad.
Indiana_fml 4
#89 is totally right. You can excuse almost any stupid or childish behaviour as long as you have a little girl around you :)