Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
Today, my phone kept beeping, so I put it on silent and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I found the guy I went on a date with last night had sent dozens of messages. The first was "Good morning! :)" and the last was "Answer me u fuckin cunt!!!!" I think I'm staying single. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me up at 5am to tell me she was mad at me. Apparently I did something bad in her dream. She still won't talk to me. FML
Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML
Today, I woke up to 20 unread messages from my friend asking why I sent her stuff like, “I hate you” and “Get lost” at 3 a.m. Turns out I sleep-texted during a nightmare. Now I have to grovel and apologize for something I don't even remember doing. FML
Today, I woke up to find my girlfriend not sleeping next to me. I go to my car and found a plethora of printed screenshots of me commenting things like, “So hot babe”, “Beautiful! I’d tap that” and other compliments on my female friends’ pictures on Facebook. My girlfriend’s not picking up her phone. FML
Today, I was woken up by my drunk girlfriend calling me and saying how much she loves me. She then stopped to tell the guy she was in bed with to be quiet because I might hear him. FML
Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML
Today, I got my phone fixed and the lady who was working on it somehow resent all the old text messages in my outbox. One was to my ex saying, "I love you." FML
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Top comments
thebomb553 5
Reply back "Goodbye!"
lickastick 27
Please... tell me more...
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Comments (189)
Reaper5639 16
Been there done that, it's all part of growing up. My girlfriend grew out of it, hope it's the same situation for you buddy.
XxQuartersxX 14
Tell that hoe to PIPE THE **** DOWN.
thatnucca 36
Why does she have to be a HOE though? Smdh
NoFlippinWai 24
27- Why question a perfect comment? I agree. Tell her that after that temper tantrum she is lucky you are talking to her at all. Then tell her to go make you a sandwich. j/k it would be funny though.
sxm 13
Just call it off with her. I dealt with a woman like, is she bipolar by any chance?
airhead2015 18
Dang, that's worse than Amy's Baking Company!
psiloveyou15 12
Text bomb her pictures of overly attached girlfriend.
Ari1337 15
so she thinks he's cheating on her with another crazy chick?
CrissyyyS2 22
I prefer the Overly Attached Girlfriend.
carmagnet 11
This kinda sucks. I normally assume he is sleeping. If I do get worried about him I tend to send a few messages then call a couple of times. It seems like such a silly think to get pissed off about. I tend to joke about it the next day but to constantly text angry messages is a bit much.
perdix 31
Good riddance. Get a good girlfriend who'll be a good sport if you forget to say good night and then you'll have good days!
More_Leg 14
Well she's a keeper....
queerdragon 20
This is the sort of behavior that makes me rethink relationships. I was with a guy who wanted me to text him every time I left the house. He wanted to know where I was going, who I was hanging with, etc. At first, it seemed kind of cute, because he seemed involved and interested. It got to the point where he would get mad if I posted online about hanging out with a friend. I went to get sushi with an old high school friend of mine, she had broken up with her boyfriend. It would have been rude and insensitive to bring my boyfriend along with me. I checked into the sushi place and ten minutes later he comes waltzing in the door, demanding to know why I didn't invite him. He sat down, ordered something expensive, and then wanted me to pay for it to "make it up to him." We ended up walking out and leaving him with the bill. He had gotten a ride, so he had to wait around for someone to pick him up. By the time he got home, I had already let myself in, gotten my things, and left. If you love her and she can be reasoned with, have a long talk about all this sort of stuff. It is not a good thing to leave it alone and let her continue to think this is acceptable behavior. It seems, however, that she does not know the meaning of no and thinks every little emotional problem needs a big, dramatic ending. If you can handle the drama, stay. If not, rethink the meaning of adult relationships.
NotoriousLES 14
Jealousies and obsessive behavior are big red flags! Good for you not allowing that in your life and I agree with your advice 100%. Not sure why your getting down voted.
queerdragon 20
I am not sure either, maybe the comment was too long. Maybe they are tired of the "break up" comments. People need to realize drama is not something you have to have in your life. You can make changes for the better, simply by speaking up and making yourself known. Op's girl sounds like she is far more intense than I could handle myself.
NotoriousLES 14
I see we're up again, one guess... The over 21 crowd must have stated voting!