Today, I found a note on my door that said, "You're the sexiest person I've ever stalked." Later, I found another note that said, "Sorry, that was meant for your roommate. You aren't my type." Not even a creepy stalker thinks I'm attractive. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, someone left a note on my car, saying "You're gorgeous. Call me. #######." I called the number and they said they saw me in the store I was in, telling me "You were the ONLY attractive person in there." We decided to meet up. He walks over, I say hi, he says "I think I put my number on the wrong car." FML
Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML
Today, I found a love letter in my mail. It was from a girl I met at a bar few weeks ago. I never gave her my address or last name. I guess I have a stalker now. FML
Today, I decided to reach out to someone I'd met randomly. I found them on social media and sent them a message. After telling my SO, he pointed out that that was stalking. I'm a creep now. FML
Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML
Today, I went on a date with a really cute guy. Things were going great, so we went to his place. While he was in the bathroom, I absentmindedly looked around his apartment. Unfortunately, his living room cupboard was half open, and I saw a shrine of pictures of me. Apparently, he's been stalking me for months. FML
Today, I found out that the person who has been stalking me has also been stalking someone else. I got upset. It seems it took being stalked to make me feel good about myself. FML
Today, at work, I overheard two of my coworkers talking about how "creepy" and "ugly" I am, and that I look like I'd be the kind of guy to sneak into someone's house and "have my way" with them. Boy, did that sure help with my self-esteem issues. I'm going to go and report them, but still. FML
Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML
Today, after months of using the empty driveway across the street from my house, a note was placed under my windshield wiper. It read, "Please stop parking in my driveway. P.S. You’re hot. Are you single?" FML
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Top comments
LittleMiss1 0
its better than being STALKED! and hes a creepy stalker guydont listen to them..
Cali_Chick 0
you should leave him a note saying 'stop stalking us or I'll report you to the police' lol!
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Comments (90)
Antoyal 3
Now granted, a lot of what we now call stalking would have been thought of as eccentric and romantic back in the day, but this guy takes the cake, OP. That's pretty creepy, LOL.
csd_fml 5
Well, you don't appear to have much sense of humor... But, just because you "aren't someone's type' doesn't mean that person thinks you're ugly. Moreover, why would you want a stranger who you've never met to consider your his type/ Especially one who claims to be your roommate's stalker...
DanceRox9008 0
you think your life is f*cked because youre NOT being stalked? thats f*cked up. FYL for thinking that.
staaa 0
who cares
goalie20 0
report him do the police. why do you want a stalker anyway?
lesp 6
It was probably a joke, but a funny one.
BeQuickOrBeDead_fml 0
Ahahahaha. This made me laugh really hard....XD
anamaia 5
"Not even a creepy stalker thinks I'm attractive." Uh, do you really want a creepy stalker to find you attractive? Don't be an idiot! Wouldn't you rather NOT be stalked??
thx1138_fml 0
that has to be the worst stalker ever. can't even get a note to the right person...
plexico 4
Even creepy stalkers have taste! It sounds like you are on the verge of stalking the stalker.