Today, a kid pulled down my shorts while I was ordering at McDonald's. In my haste to pull them back up, I hit my head on the counter and was knocked out cold. I woke up on the floor, my shorts still around my knees, in a puddle of my own urine. I had peed myself while unconscious. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was at my local McDonald's having a leak when an extremely intoxicated man stumbled in, pulled down his pants, and started to pee on my shoes. FML
Today, I went into a cafe only to be greeted by a young boy who pulled down my leggings in line. Everyone got a look at my pink Hello Kitty panties with white frilly trimming before scrambling to pick them up. In the process, I banged my head on the counter, and fell on the floor, unconscious, pants still down. FML
Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML
Today, I passed out in my car in a McDonald's parking lot. I got woken up by a cop. FML
Today, I was at one of the urinals in a bathroom. A chubby kid goes to the urinal next to mine and starts peeing violently. Apparently, he was peeing so violently that it splashed onto my legs the whole time. I picked the wrong day to wear shorts. FML
Today, I went to a McDonald's drive-thru in just a shirt and underwear, thinking I wouldn't be seeing anyone. I got into a car crash. FML
Today, I, a grown man in his 30’s, fell asleep and pissed myself like a 2 year-old at bedtime. I was at work on my dinner break and had taken a nap on the break room sofa, which is now soaked in my pee, and I have no change of clothes. Twenty coworkers and 5 senior management all know it was me. FML
Today, I was in a public bathroom, when a little boy walked in and he had an 'accident'. He asked if I could help him clean it up, so I decided to help. I started to walk to him to assist him. That's when I walked straight into the pee and slipped. My whole back was covered in pee. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML
Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Did you get fries with that?
azouwa 26
You should tell your story to a lawyer.
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Comments (33)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Did you get fries with that?
azouwa 26
You should tell your story to a lawyer.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Why? It was a kid pulling a prank. Everything else was an accident. No judge is going to preside over a case where a kid pantsed someone.
skippydoda 32
Actually, they could. The kid did something that caused bodily harm and could put that on the parents.
rodfergie 18
Actually... the parents if the kids are legally responsible for any injuries: physical, emotional, or psychological.
blightsight 10
you people are so eager to sue. you're ruining America
real life problems 26
amen to that. sueing is the first thing Americans think of when something happens. it's a ******* shame
arkh_angel 16
Why not sue Mc Donald's instead? If their counter were protected with thick rubber bands, such accidents would not happen. They should have thought about it!
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
time to play kick the kid
Mooglefox 24
And I bet the tile was told that is a no-no!
Glowworm56 27
I'll have the McPiddle to go, please!
RichardPencil 32
And all the ladies were swooning at your Big Mac?
d3rpb0t 10
Maybe the kid thought you were the Hamburglar and decided to thwart your nefarious burger-stealing ways.
CerealBro1 13
How long were you out? And no one called the paramedics? Or tried to help you? That’s just really messed up...
SneezyBear 27
I can't believe I had to scroll down this far for this comment
SneezyBear 27
I can't believe I had to scroll down this far for this comment
acmariner99 25
Was Ronald McDonald staring at you when you came to?
Justine Malang 16
Ultimate embarrassment haha that sucks
tarabella 7
This is the absolute worst and most hilarious fml i have ever read xD