Today, while at a school anti-drugs assembly, the speaker asked everyone to stand up if they knew someone who had died of an overdose. As I stood up, my friend hit me in the side, making me laugh. I stood frozen under accusing glares while the speaker bitched me out for a good 5 minutes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad heard that the guy who bullied me at school died recently of a drug overdose. For some reason, he thinks we were actually best friends, and thinks I'm doing drugs too. I'm now not allowed out of the house except to go to school. He won't listen to a word I say. FML
Today, I had to show up at an anti-drugs lecture with full-blown pink eye. It's from an ongoing bacterial infection, but the speaker said he'd heard that excuse a hundred times before, and shamed me in front of everyone. FML
Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I face-planted. I was going to say "Fuck you" and "I will kill you." It came out as "I will fuck you." He's still laughing. FML
Today, unlike what you may have joked about with your friends, I actually did meet people who told me to "take a hit or we'll beat the shit out of you." I got picked up by my mom 20 minutes later like planned. When my mom noticed I was high, she grounded me for the "rest of high school." FML
Today, in class my friend played a joke on me by pulling my seat from under me while i was about to sit. I fell and everybody laughed at me. During the next class, I did the same thing to him. He broke his arm. He was the star of the basketball team. Nobody laughed. FML
Today, I was walking to class, when a kid came up behind me and smacked me in the face a few times until I fell to the ground. I rolled over and he said, "Oh shit! Wrong person, my bad." FML
Today, I was in school when I got up to ask the teacher a question. For no reason, the guy sitting next to me punched me in the gut so hard I collapsed and saw stars. The teacher simply rolled her eyes and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I got expelled from school. I was walking down a flight of stairs when I tripped and bumped into a kid ahead of me by mistake. He fell forward and took half a dozen people down with him. The staff think I did it on purpose, and there's talk of charges being pressed. FML
Today, at school, I was crying because someone I knew had died. My teacher pulled me aside and said, "I understand you're socially awkward, but don't worry, it gets better." FML
Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML
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Top comments
Frosc 0
a bit of a fail there, also your friend's an ass.
john443 5
I think your friend is the one who overdosed
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Comments (215)
meg238f 0
Should've told them what happened, and if they didn't believe you, bitch slap 'em.
Beck2209 0
That really sucks, but you should defend yourself. I would.
zeta24 0
sry for ur loss. all of u people hu r saying he needs to stop breathing and shit?? because he lost a friend?? wow. just wow.
DocBastard 40
Edit: the comment I was referring to vanished. Nothing to see here.
testthecoal 5
Should have sawed it off and stuff it in his cavity.
Picking_Kuppies 0
My teacher announced how a girl in my class had got hit by a train because she was walking on the tracks; and I laughed. Everybody was quiet, I was the only one laughing (or making any noise, for that matter). After about 8 seconds of awkward silence, she was like: "So, TODAY, WE'RE GOING TO BE WORKING ON..." It was funny. Seriously.
Picking_Kuppies 0
Oh, and the girl is fine. She was walking on the tracks, but there were more tracks right next to them. There had been a train that came by on the tracks next to her a while before, so [when she heard the train that was about to hit her coming] she assumed it was on the other tracks. She had her hood up and was listening her iPod, yet, somehow, she didn't think to check. This was months ago.
Picking_Kuppies 0
My friends always come up to me and randomly jab spots on my sides, it makes me either freak out or burst out laughing, that's probably what OP meant.
KourtneyRay 2
I woulda told on my friend!
sleepydeath 4
y it's not that bad getting bitched at
OCDC 9
I would have too...if I was still in kindergarten.
sterlingarcher 1
haha lol that happens to me too! I'll just start laughing or someone will make me laugh when it's is super quiet or it is supposed to be a serious moment.. :D
sterlingarcher 1
I was trying to reply to #6..
jrsgreenfire257 0
Tell ur friend to go Fuc* off ^_^
maggie03 0
I had that assembly too .