Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I helped an old man who fell over. Turns out he was drunk and had pissed himself. He decided to thank me with a hug. FML
Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML
Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML
Today, at work at a grocery store an old couple came through my checkout lane. As I was putting their bagged groceries in the cart, the old man started feeling me up. FML
Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML
Today, an old man wanted to give me a tip for bagging his groceries. He slipped some money as deep into my pocket as he could, stroking my thigh for a few long seconds in the process, then he gave me a creepy smile and winked before walking away. FML
Today, I helped an elderly lady put a bookshelf in her car. She then thanked me by hitting me with her car as she drove out of the parking lot. FML
Today, I saw an old man who needed help crossing the street. I went over to him and helped him across the street. When he thanked me, I said, "No problem, sir." They responded by hitting me in the happy sacks and screaming that they were a woman. FML
Today, the cute coworker who's been flirting with me drove me home. While I was contemplating asking him to kiss me, he politely told me to, "Please get out, I promised my girlfriend I'd pick her up." FML
Today, when we were at wrestling practice, we had to bend over to stretch. When I bent down, I noticed a car on the street stopped. There was a sixty year old man watching us. He then licked his lips and drove away. FML
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Top comments
OrangeCrayon 0
Kinky.
pleasedonttellme 0
Omg..like half of the FML's this week are about perverted old men You wonder if it's the same guy ^.^
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Comments (72)
OrangeCrayon 0
Kinky.
bonertastic 0
kinky indeed. and awkward. this one should be on awkwardintercourse.com
RyGan 0
YDI for hitting on old, lonely, horny men with canes
CRlovers123 0
lmfao.
jmrtheman 3
epic f***ing win!
EsotericBrent 29
I'm thoroughly grossed out now... FYL OP.
lebrockshard 10
Ewwwwwwwwww... thanks for the horrible mental image and FYL!!
fckinbowdown 0
that's so ******* disgusting
elgordito_fml 0
lol, thats kinda hot!!
BloodShard 0
That's absolutely D-I-S-G-U-S-T-I-N-G.
Ohhaithar 0
That's sooo nasty xD
whatthefuckcunt 0
jeez you guys are bad sports, have you never heard of good service? who wants help and a ride home if they don't get a happy ending!
pleasedonttellme 0
Omg..like half of the FML's this week are about perverted old men You wonder if it's the same guy ^.^
Laxloverr24 0
haha ya gotta love old people!
FaddiusPrime 0
Hasn't had much in a while?
Mx_Rider 6
that old poop was prolly good at sex, prolly knew every position there was. shame you woulda had a blast idk if you are a girl/guy op didnt bother looking :D
BloodShard 0
Still, that's still really really gross
Tripout 0
Think of the experience u can have ur eyes closed the whole time ROFLMFAO
alexandraa_fml 0
The coulda' done the sideways shuffle.