Today, I tried to pick up a girl by asking her what the time was as a conversation starter. She responded by telling me it was time to pick a girl more in my league. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I tried to pick up two girls by asking them what time it was. They burst out laughing. FML
Today, I asked a girl what time she'd like me to pick her up for our date tonight. She didn't know what I was talking about. It seems like, after months of sweaty palms, nervous smiles, and awkward sentences, I only dreamed she said yes to going out. FML
Today, I sent a girl a friendly conversation starter on Facebook. She replied, "I know what you guys are like. Oh, and that invitation to a date in about 5 messages time? Not a chance." FML
Today, I got rejected by a girl I wasn't even trying to ask out. FML
Today, I was online dating and a girl from high school messaged me. Thinking she might have matured since we're now in our 40's, I messaged back. She then said it was a joke and that I'm still a desperate, pathetic nerd trying to score with the hottest girl in class. FML
Today, I told a girl that I liked her. She replied, "Don't." FML
Today, I saw a cute girl at a bar and decided to go and chat her up. After charming her with my usual crap for a while, I told her she was really pretty, and asked for her number. She replied, "You asshole, I met you here a year ago and gave you my number, and you never called me." FML
Today, I saw a beautiful girl at the bar. I attempted to be friendly and hit her up for a chat. She called me a “creep” and told me to get lost. A few moments later, another guy does the exact same thing I did and she smiled and kept flirting. FML
Today, I was playing Badminton in P.E, and I was paired with a particularly pretty girl, who for some reason kept asking stupid questions that we both knew the answers to. I've only now just realized that she was trying to initiate conversation with me. This is why I have no friends. FML
Today, I asked out this girl I've been spending a lot of time with lately. She told me she was only hanging out with me because she thought I was gay and wouldn't try to get in her pants. FML
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Top comments
DocBastard 40
Sounds like she just clocked you in the face.
Megan98 18
I would've said "You're right, I can do so much better".... Then laugh when she has a bitch fit.
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Comments (49)
icepick23 12
Sounds like you need to start going to the gym.
anyoldnamewilldo 23
I will never understand why people think they are so perfect and better than everyone that it gives them the right to be rude. A simple "I'm not interested" will suffice.
kkrazyangel 16
You deserve that buddy! But lesson learned and now you can think of better conversation starters now...hopefully!
x_Dylian_x 2
Response: 'Oh..I didn't know bitches had formed their own league.'
azhang1066 12
Shit happens. Get over it.
JackFaire 27
That's when you reply. Sorry just thought I would try slumming it today never mind.
TheMystery13 13
"Well forgive me, I usually avoid gutter trash like you, but there are no supermodels around and just need my knob polished."
anonomysqwerty 7
ROASTED BITCH
DLBL 23
I wish you'd said, "Sure, but I felt like slumming today."