Today, I was listening to some Michael Jackson through my earphones when I saw this really cute girl. Trying to impress, I approached her while doing some dance moves, not thinking about how unbelievably stupid it must have looked without the music. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at the gym, I saw this really pretty girl. Trying to impress her, I started lifting with heavy weights. One of the weights slipped out of my hand. I then dropped the other one, trying to make it seem like it was on purpose. I dropped the weight on my phone. I squealed. She giggled. FML
Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
Today, as I waited to fly home, a very attractive woman smiled and gestured towards the seat next to me. However, a hyperactive child and his mother barged past into said empty seats. The woman really hit it off with the guy behind, while I was stuck listening to a kid scream at Angry Birds. FML
Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way, my mother said, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then said, "Does he know that?" FML
Today, I found out that licking your very chapped lips while totally zoned out and looking in the general direction of a girl, will end up with you becoming the massive college creeper that everyone avoids. FML
Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML
Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML
Today, my band played for our school. We were cheered for and everything. Being the lead singer, I tried to look cool and push the mic away and pull it back by pushing down the bottom of the stand with my foot. It hit my face and I bled like crazy, but I kept singing. No one clapped at the end. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to online for weeks. When I showed up, he looked nothing like his profile picture, and he spent the entire time talking about his ex-girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
saIty 17
Grabbing your crotch while moonwalking?... Not always the best way to impress a lady.
DontClickOnMe 28
I pressed YDI as soon as I saw "trying to impress." But hopefully she thought it was cute. :)
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Comments (81)
DontClickOnMe 28
I pressed YDI as soon as I saw "trying to impress." But hopefully she thought it was cute. :)
hockeyoceancity 13
I think you're cute.
TrueTriage 16
You didn't click on them did you?!
MrBrightside21 20
If OP only would've pulled out "The Lawn Mower", or "The Shopping Cart," they would be making babies right now. But no, you had to try to scoot backwards.
TheStoryOfWazza 9
The bus driver could have work too.
NoOneCaresReally 8
I pressed ydi as soon as I saw his spelling of 'Michael'..
everydayFML2121 5
Why, #1? Where would we be if everyone just sat around hoping people would be interested? Not that many people get lucky like that so rest of the people in the world are left to do there best to find a relationship. Which usually, at some point, entails trying to impress someone. Even if it does create a lot of FMLs it's just a normal, human thing to do. Don't dislike for trying, dislike for how they try.
PenguinSwag47 0
78 - That was profound. I applaud you.
everydayFML2121 5
80- why thank you! :D I try.
teague95 16
all I can think of is, "show that bitch some dance moves, bitches love dance moves"
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
You've been hit by You've been hit by A smoooooth criminal~
Jamie1806 8
Like 1 said, she might have thought it was cute, and if you got her to laugh, you definitely came up with an interesting way to start conversation.
MZPONY 7
83 - Isn't it "you've been hit by, you've been struck by, a smooth criminal?"
DontClickOnMe 28
78 - You know, you're completely right. I never thought of it that way and it's most definitely true, so thank you. =)
Daederoth 10
I clicked on you. What are you going to do about it? Yeah, I'm a renegade like that.
hwkfan1 10
You lost any chance you had of getting her to "Beat It" for you.
saIty 17
Grabbing your crotch while moonwalking?... Not always the best way to impress a lady.
MURIKKA 11
Now doing the worm towards a woman? Works every time.
dkwood 7
This reminds me so much of Garth in Wayne's world.
TrueTriage 16
Now if he had pulled out the thriller moves it would have been equally hilarious and may have worked... Actually no it wouldn't have..
Dr0reos 8
Yeah probably didn't help that you had a horde of unusually well dressed dancing zombies behind you,OP.
unknown_user5566 27
*Shrugs* I would have found it to be cute. Then again, I've always liked geeky guys, so maybe that's why. Do your thang, OP. ;)
perdix 31
Even if the music was there, your moves would have looked unbelievably stupid. I hope you weren't doing your boy-fondling moves.
ManInTheMachine 20
Considering during his concerts he sent women AND men away on stretchers, I would think he could pull it off. Well, maybe not for my generation, who listens the media more than common sense, and probably legitimately thinks he was a child molester.
GothicAngel17 24
25 - Pedophile or not, you gotta admit that in his later years he was seriously creepy :|
hockeyoceancity 13
28- He did pay of afew families to not make him look guilty but that doesn't change the fact he was an amazing singer and dancer. Also he had problems... That's why he came off creepy in his later years. He was abused bad by his father and the media doesn't help him feel better... Damn media just tormented him.
GothicAngel17 24
I didn't say he was a pedophile. I'm not inclined to believe the media that easily, and since it's the only source of information I have on the subject, then I've no right to say he is a pedophile, hence why I said pedophile or not. But you're right, either way, and all mental issues aside, he was still an amazing artist.
hockeyoceancity 13
44- I didn't mean to say you thought he was. You seem smart enough to not believe the media haha. But yes he was amazing, it's sad he died the way he did and so young.
ishida1235 0
Ur wrong he couldn't sing he did the world a favor by committing suicide
killingj0ke23 0
lol I just pictured that. hilarious, fyl
Renesaga 8
I got a beautiful mental image of some guy listening to music, leaning against a light post. Then this girl comes along, so the guy throws his hands up and then moonwalks toward her, mumbling the lyrics. Then he realizes he had earphones in, and just goes "Oh.."
yeanoshit 7
It's the thought that counts
iStrukk 7
No, its the Counts who thought. Get it right.
onlychildFTW 34
Really 17? What did you want to accomplish with that comment?
SheWalksInBeauty 3
Heheh, nice work, dude.
Blake3815 0
I don't know why everyone does not like your comment. Those narrow minded bastards!
WiseGuy79 14
It was the one white glove that really scared her away...
alshygirl 14
Or the crotch grabbing and pelvic thrusting
everydayFML2121 5
Or the grunting and other weird MJ noises. Uh ah! Ohh! Hheee hooo!
drunkandfml 11
You can never be able to resist Michael
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I bet op was a Thriller to her. Hopefully, when they're older, they'll Remember the Time when Things weren't Bad. Scream it from the roof tops, op! You love that Liberian Girl! Don't Blame it on the Boogie-- it's Human Nature for her to Rock your World. You Are Not Alone, cause if you were, you'd have to Beat It to a picture of Billie Jean. Be lucky she's such a PYT.
Michele2luv 8
^Best comment ever :D
Irishgypsy 2
You need to get out more. YDI
xXxIracebethxXx 14
Yeah, 'cause he met the cute girl in his house. Obviously he WAS out and about. He have been dancing like a fool, but he was still out, you dick.
Irishgypsy 2
Did you not see the word MORE? I didn't say he needs to get out. Read the entire statement.
immaMonsta 8
You know, it takes more than dance moves to impress a girl; especially when you're trying to get with said girl by dancing randomly to music she can't hear. It just makes you look dumb.