Today, after a nap, I went to scratch my eye and felt what I presumed to be a clump of mascara on my eyelash. I didn't wear mascara today. It was a tick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to find a tick stuck to my eyelashes. The only way I know of to get it off is with fire. FML
Today, I applied mascara directly onto my eyeball. FML
Today, I found out that if you cry yourself sleep and forget to take off your mascara, your top and bottom lashes will stick together. Leaving you unable to open your eyes. FML
Today, I was about to get in the shower, when I felt an odd itch in my navel. I saw what I thought was bellybutton lint, so I pulled on it, and quickly realized what I had between my fingers was a still-squirming, headless tick. FML
Today, I was cleaning mouse remains from the kitchen floor, left by my cat. I found a small round thing nearby. With no idea what it was, I picked it up and gave it a little squeeze to see if it was solid. It wasn't, and burst with great force onto my face. I'm pretty sure it was an eye. FML
Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML
Today, I woke up to a weird feeling on my face. Thinking it was a bug, I slapped at it. It was my freshly-inserted nose ring. FML
Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML
Today, while I was shaving my nose started to itch. Guess which I shaved and which I itched. FML
Today, after working 8 hours and immediately packing my house for another 6 hours to prepare for moving, I was extremely exhausted and more than ready to brush my teeth and go to bed. I tiredly brushed my teeth with my mascara. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Crash92 0
Where have you been sticking your head?
TurtleGenius 0
Pour gasoline on your eyelashes and set it on fire; that should help. FYL indeed.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (135)
cannetteXchaos 0
I would freak so bad. FYL.
audiogasmic 0
OMFG i would freak the **** out, i had one on my collarbone once but i'd have to say your situation is incredibly worse. ew ew ew. fyl.
Alexifish 0
ewwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!!
elliekinslurvsya 0
get over it. does it really matter? where i used to live, i would find ticks all the time. i hate stupid wimps who can't take it-- like when i was in elementary school, a few times someone would find a tick in the classroom, and every single person, the girls, boys, and the teacher, screamed and ran away from it, except for me. then of course i had to find it and get rid of it for them. dammit. people like you piss me off.
george1124 0
same for me as 108 GET OVER IT. this is not an fml
PredyJessica 0
wow...just wow....
lologirl419 0
Why are you even wearing mascara if your eyelashes are so thick that you can get ticks stuck in them?
MADISAYSYDI 0
*stops chewing* These are the FMLs you just really don't want to come across while eating, ya know?
Mademoiselle_fml 34
I've learned not to eat while on any of these kinds of websites :c lol
ylmm 0
Those are not ticks! I'm pretty sure you have crabs
Gotz_No_Love 1
i hate the fact that you can't just yank the tick off. the head will just stay in and your skin will grow over it and probably cause an infection.