Today, my daughter asked me to braid her hair. When I was done, she said Daddy's girlfriend does it better. I wasn't aware we had an open marriage. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my daughter told me that she liked her "other daddy" better. I don't know who's she talking about, but my wife is doing a good job telling her to be quiet. FML
Today, someone asked my wife if I was her father. FML
Today, I found out my daughter has a higher paid job in the same company I work in. I also found out she is dating my boss. FML
Today, I realized my daughter has been in longer relationships than I have. FML
Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML
Today, I went to a salon. As soon as I walked in, someone ran to me and inspected my hair and said, "We can fix this." I was there to get my daughter's hair done. FML
Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that his daughter only liked me because she thought that we look like siblings. FML
Today, I got my long hair cut in a short pixie cut. When my five year old daughter saw me she laughed and proclaimed 'You look just like a man!'. That afternoon I got a concerned call from the school. My daughter has told everyone 'mummy has gone away, I now have two daddies!' FML
Today, my eldest daughter announced she was getting divorced. She never even told me she was married. FML
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Top comments
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Get proof so you can close the marriage quickly.
sarsuela 29
Perhaps it was a workmate and there's nothing shady?
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Comments (12)
fallenlikethesky 12
Lawd, I'd have divorce papers ready before he even walked in the door!