Today, a street preacher got on my metro car and gave a long, loud speech about how we sinful, polluted congressional staffers must inform our bosses that choosing a homosexual lifestyle was like trading your soul for soup. We got stuck in a tunnel for thirty minutes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the subway and there was a guy yelling, "Regret your sins and devote yourself to God right now." Another man got up from his seat and told him, "I work 12 hours a day and all I want is to go home and rest, you shut the fuck up or I'll make you meet God personally." FML
Today, while finishing shopping with my kids, my female best friend and I were accosted by a street preacher. He screamed that we were an abomination, having biracial children was a sin against nature, and that we were ruining America. Not only we are not gay, he made my kids cry. FML
Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML
Today, while on the tramway with my friend, we ended up discussing religion. When we started talking about God, some guy asked us, in a serious tone, to "stop talking about me" because it was really starting to bother him. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, a man on the subway serenaded me. That's not the issue. He was cross-eyed, making it hard for me not to laugh in his face. FML
Today, hoping to seal the deal on a promotion, I had my boss over for dinner. My dad, who lives with me, started ranting about homosexuals burning in hell. My boss’s daughter is a lesbian. Now my dad’s nose is broken and I fear for my job. FML
Today, I lost my earbuds on the subway to work, so I had to listen to my boss's terrible music all day. FML
Today, I was taking the subway home when some entitled fuck called me a "junkie", all because I'm long-haired and have my arms covered in tattoos. FML
Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML
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Top comments
Vidrill 22
Sometimes living in the city means you have to drown out all the noise pollution. And that comes out of people's mouths sometimes...
girlbye23 15
People like that make good Christians look bad
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Comments (135)
Outlier357 7
I think I will take the soup, what good is a soul anyway? Because I could really go for a good beef stew right about now
SaintJimmy21 19
"Hey, preachy asshole! Shut up!"
ChunkyBuiscuit 13
I wanna meet that guy and shake his hand. I don't preach it but I love those who do
pdp_fml 21
Maybe his allegations are true?
sandy105 3
Happened to me too, on a train..an ex-drug addict carrying on. And on. It occured to me later that he just swopped one addiction for another....
Huddisher 10
Some preachers are ignorant.
sythe511 28
I agree with the preacher.
tjanus 2
I hope you'll turn down the obamaCare congressional subsidy and follow the law
awsamb 8
How ironic. It seems as he's the one doing the polluting.
mattuti 8
I like soup.