Today, I didn't have my key, so my sister told me to call her to let me in. I called, no answer. I waited for 15 minutes and then called my dad complaining about her, still being outside. She popped her out the window and yelled, "Don't talk about me, bitch!" and wouldn't open the door. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while out to lunch, my sister called me and asked me to pick her up from the mall. I told her she'd have to wait. She got pissed off and started cursing at me, so I hung up on her. She called me back 37 times until I answered and yelled "WILL YOU LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE?" It was my boss. FML
Today, I couldn't find my key so I sat against the wall to wait for my roommate to get home. I fell asleep. When I woke up a few hours later, I could hear her inside. She chose not to wake me up and let me in. FML
Today, my family decided that we should have our breakfast at a hawker centre, so I passed my house key to my sister as she carries a bag with her. After our meal, she said she was meeting her friend, so we went back home instead, only to realize that the door was locked and my sister had the key. FML
Today, I didn't know that my toxic mother went to my sister's house. I called her, and she said to my sister while on the call to me, "She's so loud and always disturbing me." I cut the call and stopped talking to her. She's mad now and my dad's scolding me for hurting her. FML
Today, my sister couldn't find the spare key I gave her for my apartment, so I had to pay a $50 fee to the leasing office. Not 30 minutes after paying, she found the key. In her purse. On her keychain. FML
Today, I tried sneaking over to my girlfriend's house to be romantic and knocked on her window. She went and got her mother to see who was at the window. FML
Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML
Today, I was in my backyard. When I wanted to come back in the house, I tried to open the sliding door. I knew that my brother locked me out so I banged on the door very hard, causing the glass to break. It turns out that the door wasn't locked. FML
Today, I snuck out of the house for a night on the town. When I got back, I found all the doors and windows bolted shut. My sister's laughing face at my bedroom window suggests I'll be spending the rest of the night outside. FML
Today, after leaving my mom's house, I got 4 text messages from her about how I was a terrible person for not saying goodbye to my sister when I left. The "sister" she was referring to is the family dog. FML
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Top comments
Cinn_fml 23
Wow, I mean, locking someone out for a joke is only funny for a few minutes. By the point you've had to ring someone else to have her leant out and be bitchy, it's gone way beyond a joke. I'd recommend payback, but she seems like the type of girl who'd be able to land you in it by exaggerating it and making you seem like the bad guy.
sam_08_fml 0
Then bitch slap the shit outta her
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Comments (80)
elmorous 0
later, when she's sleeping, tie her to her bed and fill the crack of her ass with strawberry jam
Karnezar 2
that sounds strangely erotic, #41
skyeyez9 25
Siblings suck. My brother used to lock me outside, snoop in my room, steal my money from my purse, 'borrow' a video game of mine (cd, or any other item he felt like taking) and break it. I asked my parents for a lock on my door....they said No.
LittleMagicWolf 7
shoulda rang and knocked repeatedly, AND kept talking about her, until she got mad enough to come outside, then push her out the way and lock HER outside.
FerrariCake 2
Just make sure you have your keys with you from now on. Problem solved.
d4m4s74 12
Do what I did once. Break door window with your bare hands and open the door from the outside. Blame it on your sister because you know, it's her fault.
d4m4s74 12
Before I forget, don't forget to call your dad first (tell him what she did, say if the door isn't open within five minutes you break the window) or your sister (same story without the tell him what she did part) In case of your sister, don't forget to record
fakeaccountX 6
Chop down the door and say "Heerrrrrre's Johnny!"
REELAX_fml 0
LMAO YESSSSS and when she's sleeping wear an old hockey mask bring a chain saw and just rip it with an evil laughing and see what happens haha
ArmenianPrincess 5
You probably have done worse things to her so don't complain. and all you dumbasses that said he should hit his sister, he would be the biggest bitch if he did that. Hitting a female when you're a male is the worse thing, it makes you the biggest pussy ever
ElMundio87 0
the op is female
rocker_chick23 27
Looks like you're the ******* dumbass. It clearly states that OP is female.
jdime209 2
that's funny.. lmao..
EmilyTheLost 0
lmao ydi for not fighting back
TyIsGeek 0
guess it never matters what you do.