Today, while on the bus, an elderly man fell asleep on my shoulder. He looked sweet, so I didn't push him off. A few minutes later, the bus jolted and his head slipped down into my breasts. I'm pretty sure you don't smile like that when you're really asleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the bus. When I woke up, my head was resting on the broad, tanned shoulder of the smoking hot guy sitting next to me. I had drooled a little. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus on my commute to work, when I nodded off on the charming young man next to me. Something cold and wet touched me, and I looked down to see a small pool of my saliva collecting on my chest. The man thought this was hilarious. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML
Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML
Today, I was in the bus on my way home. I was reading a book, and drops of something were getting all over it. It was the man sitting next to me who was asleep and drooling. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the bus taking me home after a long hard day at work. I woke up with my head on a stranger’s shoulder, drooling. The worst part? The stranger was my crush from college, who I haven’t seen in years. Turns out we have the same bus route. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the train and accidentally wound up resting my head on a strange man's shoulder. When I woke up, I discovered that not only did he not object, but he decided to return the favor by resting his hand on my thigh. I was wearing a skirt. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
ChampionKO 6
One hell of a smart old man.
ckoal 3
Nice... For him
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (91)
akiahara 14
You might want to fortify your personal bubble. Expand it, perhaps.
mattlw 25
Im sorry about that, I just couldn't resist myself.
Enslaved 38
Fluffy pillows make me smile. :D
chanellgymnast 17
He knew exactly what he was doing. Clever, indeed.
AKGirlinSD 20
Some women need to learn the hard way. Old people can get away with a lot now. I can't wait to get to that age :-).
Kkkdawg 27
I don't care how sweet he looked. I do NOT enjoy strangers touching me. I would have pushed him off/woke him up the second he got too close. Good on you for being polite :S *cringe*
perdix 31
Yeah, we do. The older we get, the more we dream of boobs and smile;)
asdfghjklmoo 15
He was smiling because it suddenly got a lot more comfortable than your shoulder.
vbmg152 19
YDI for not getting him off you in the first place! Don't let men use you for a pillow!
joe502 3
Come on... You look fluffy & married for 25 years... I am sure your husband has used you as a pillow, many a time...
perdix 31
#3, that trick is even older than books! They found it discussed in the Dead Sea scrolls. Interestingly, they knew about motorboating before people invented motors. Must be like that Ezekiel "wheel in the sky" thing.