Today, I was written up for being late to work. I was late because somebody in my dorm stole my pants. All of them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, someone broke into my house and stole all of my underwear. FML
Today, after volleyball practice, I noticed my pants were missing. Now I have to go to work wearing spandex bottoms, all because one of my teammates is a thieving douche. FML
Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML
Today, I woke up on the couch and realized I had fallen asleep while doing laundry. Ran to the laundry room, and found all my clothes gone. I really wish I hadn't been doing a load of all my pants. FML
Today, I was washing some clothes in the laundry room at my apartment complex. I went back an hour later, passed my neighbor on the way in, and moved my clothes to the dryer. I just brought them back from the dryer, and all my underwear are missing. FML
Today, my co-worker, who used to be in a frat with me in college, decided to tell all my coworkers as well as my boss all the stupid things I did in college, starting with the time a girl stole my clothes and I had to walk across campus naked. FML
Today, at work, I went to fold a pair of pants that was left in a changing room to find out that someone had taken a dump in them. FML
Today, I was trying on some clothes in the store's changing room, when someone reached under the door and grabbed my purse, shoes, and pants. FML
Today, I arrived at work and was immediately given a disciplinary write-up for being two hours late for my shift. Apparently the manager had changed my schedule that morning and failed to tell me. FML
Today, I was shopping at a store from which I had previously bought a shirt. The clerk accused me of trying to steal my own shirt and called security. They examined it and argued with me for so long I was late to work. FML
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Top comments
Aerobic_Exorcism 13
I guess someone wanted to get in your pants ;)
Rei_Ayanami 18
May be time to put a lock on your dresser or closet door. Good luck getting them back.
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Comments (30)
Rei_Ayanami 18
May be time to put a lock on your dresser or closet door. Good luck getting them back.
cj89898 24
The pants or the person who stole them >:)
Rei_Ayanami 18
Why not both? :)
Aerobic_Exorcism 13
I guess someone wanted to get in your pants ;)
junjunbun 28
Hm, I wonder how this could've happened, but if it happens again don't be a pantsy and go in the nude, like a real man.
GhostFox 34
Someone wither really misinterpreted the phrase "getting into someone's pants," was incredibly desperate, or has an unusual fetish.
GhostFox 34
What the hell is with my phone's autocorrect? I meant 'either,' though I don't think that would be the correct word either.
CheekyRaccoon 27
The centipede bandit strikes again. Half man, half centipede, his only intention is to steal your pants and maybe one shirt.
zach205 24
That would work if pants only converded your legs, not also your waist. Save the joke for when someone steals a lot of shoes.
CheekyRaccoon 27
Well, he could've cut and stitch them together to make one long continues pant.
saxaddict122 14
Hey give 6 some credit, at least he didn't make another "get in your pants" joke.
CheekyRaccoon 27
The centipede bandit strikes again. Half man, half centipede. His only intention is to steal your pants and maybe one shirt.
CheekyRaccoon 27
Well this is odd. Sorry for the double post. I tried to edit my comment and it posted the corrected one, while still keeping the original :/
Sir_Cow 17
Was it that cat?
edris_305 21
Someone must be desperate to not do laundry for that week
Steffi 26
OP had their pants stolen, washing them has nothing to do with it.
edris_305 21
I meant the guy who stole all the pants must be desperate to not do laundry :3
Unenunciable 14
Do you own any skirts or dresses? Also, isn't there a campus police or SOMEONE you can contact about this theft? Maybe you could put up some flyers describing your pants' distinctive features, maybe someone will recognize the thief. You probably already have realized you should be locking your door, they could have potentially stolen something much more valuable.
Wizardo 34
Nargles. Perverted one at that.