Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend dumped me for another guy by text. I felt so betrayed, I stupidly tried to hurt her by replying that I'd been cheating on her all along with a hot babe. Turned out the dumping text was actually a prank by her friend. Now I'm single and everyone thinks I'm a cheater. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through a text message. In retaliation, I started typing a long list of everything I hate about her. Just as I pressed the send button, she text me again saying "Just joking. You know I'd never leave you. Love you babe :)" FML
Today, my girlfriend left me for my best friend. Over a text message with "lol" in it. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and threw all my stuff out into the yard because she caught me "texting another woman". Guess it didn't matter to her that the contact name was "Mom". FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me. Her exact words used were "I like the idea of you, but I don't like you." I still don't know what that means. FML
Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML
Today, I dumped my girlfriend because she frequently wouldn't answer my texts or phone calls, and not call or message back for days. I felt that bringing it up made me a control freak. I couldn't take it anymore. FML
Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML
Today, I received a text from my girlfriend in which she broke up with me. I was upset, but one minute later another text from her said, "Sorry, wrong person." FML
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Top comments
grahambertus 11
Well it looks like life might get better without her.
JustAReaderZZZZ 10
Why did you choose to stay with her if you were always "viciously insulted"?
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Comments (77)
laurapiggy 3
She wasn't worth your time! I promise there are kind, lovely women out there that know how to treat a man:)
hurley12 30
I like how this FML was written.
worldclassrager 41
I sometimes don't understand why people don't have the balls to do that themselves...but you'll find someone better..,
Dave_Davington 34
Why would you date someone like that in the first place?
shinymaster3000 23
She probably wasn't like that when they just started dating
emilyjgraham 34
31, although I do agree with what you're saying there's abusive relationships that aren't always abusive. She may have being really loving at times and it's quite understandable for OP (or anyone in that type of relationship) to believe there's a chance they'll change. If on the other hand she was abusive everyday with no show of loving emotion then it's up to the OP to muster together enough confidence (some people don't like being lonely or can't do it) to end it. You have to have a lot of will power to just walk away from something or someone that you're in love with but can't deal with the relationship.
Bicko2004 25
Wow you sound bitter; looks like you didn't want to be dumped!
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
It sounds like you 2 were having a very happy and healthy relationship. I understand why you're not over the moon it's over.
rokolodo 10
You should get together with BellinaNico. Two comments ago.
Kyle_Kawi27 7
Its okay bro it gets better trust me, keep your chin up!
lonelyharts86 8
You will definitely come to realize that life is better this way. Delete her number and DO NOT call her. She's a bitch, karma will get get.
lonelyharts86 8
Karma will get her*