Today, I finally started doing cardio and getting in shape. What motivated me to do it? Watching a zombie movie. The slow ones bite the dust first. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, we had a sprint race in gym class that I wasn't looking forward to because I'm a little chubby. The race started and I shot off as fast as I could, somehow in the lead. Everyone was cheering. When I was nearing the finish line I turned around, only to see the race hadn't started yet. FML
Today, my extremely in-shape boyfriend told me he hasn't had a chance to work out lately. I jokingly poked him in the belly saying he's getting chunky and winked. He burst into tears. FML
Today, I finally started my job as an in-home caregiver. The man I was hired to care for died two hours after I made it to his house. FML
Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML
Today, I was together with a few of my friends when I got up the courage to confess I have an eating disorder. One of my friends then said "... but you're not skinny." FML
Today, I chipped my tooth on a beer bottle. While I was drinking alone in my basement. FML
Today, my music students began a lively debate about whether or not a music stand would make a good weapon for the zombie apocalypse. What am I teaching them? FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, after an extensive talk with a relationship counselor, we concluded that I'm more likely to get run over by a car than be in a stable relationship. FML
Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML
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Top comments
Laterial 3
Gotta love Zombieland!
frutoish 0
That's what got me going. Gotta survive the zombie apocalypse.
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Comments (343)
Sabraynay 10
Reminds me of playing tag when I was younger. FML
1958x 6
I think that's great motivation.
perdix 31
You may want to add a vigorous resistance-training routine to your program. You're going to need a lot of strength to crack open skulls to eat brains. Also, stretching might help. Those zombies look awfully stiff when they walk. If you are flexible, you might have a bit more spring in your zombie shuffle.
HomeAl0ne 20
You have your tinfoil cap on backwards perdix. OP is worried that when the zombie apocalypse comes, they will be too unfit to outrun them. Stop giving the zombies ideas!
perdix 31
Oh, I read it as the OP wanted to be a zippy zombie when the time came.
skygirl333 3
Ahaha zippy zombie.... Never thought about it that way lol
IronBrig4 3
How is this an FML? You're getting into shape and living a healthier lifestyle. And WHEN (not if) the zombies attack you'll be prepared. All I do is wish you well. :-)
Zassie 5
lol it works but my boyfriend got me to excerise cause I hate seeing him sit and play call of duty zombies all night so now we take our dog for bike rides now I can out bike him when the zombie apocolipes happens :-)
nixter5 18
You better be ready when the apocalypse comes!!
Magex 12
Rule 1: Cardio Rule 2: Double tap Rule 3: Beware bathrooms Rule 4: Wear Seatbelts
jren207 24
Rule 5: ???? Rule 6: PROFIT!!!
Tarak_fml 7
Wat about don't be a hero? And you gotta enjoy the little things?
OhWowLovely 4
The only and best motivation for getting fit!
Mr_Chow 5
I don't see a problem with this to be honest =]
baseballlegitly0 2
hey what works works and best be gettin some guns ;)