Today, I went on a first date. Everything was going well until he asked me, "So, what's the biggest thing you've stuck up your vag?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend was about to go down on me as foreplay before losing his virginity and he actually poked my clitoris and said, "What’s this thing?" FML
Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I met online. While cuddling on the couch, he asked me for a blow job. I refused. He said, "But I thought big girls liked doing that." FML
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Today, my date was about to go down on me when he burst out laughing. I'd bought some new sexy panties, which apparently had a sticker on them that came off and got stuck to me. It seems my vagina had been examined by employee No.32 for quality control purposes. FML
Today, I went on a blind date. The first words that came out of his mouth were, "Rape isn't that bad if you think about it." FML
Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML
Today, my date dropped me off at home and briefly met my parents. As he was leaving he whispered into my ear, "I want to feel the inside of your vagina with the outside of my penis." My parents totally heard. FML
Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your vagina?" FML
Today, my boyfriend stated that we should play a game where one person asks the other a question, and they answer it with a picture. I thought it sounded fun so I said yes. His first question was, "Do you shave your minge?" FML
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Top comments
foxwasalamb 24
what the ****..? maybe its a clever way of saying he has a large penis
HappyItalian 38
"Probably not you."
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Comments (122)
KrispyKreme_92 8
What is happening to the human race ?
CandyApple88 13
Ever see the movie "Idiocracy"? ever day, i see more and more 'evidence' that this movie was in fact a documentary about the future.
Kazze 31
Should have said something scary to freak him out. "What's the biggest thing you've put in your vag?" "A bowling ball."
MyNameIsTim 2
or "our future baby"
CandyApple88 13
He probably was looking for someone to .... film.... Suggested answer to his question "First you tell me what is the biggest thing you've shoved up your ass?"
Fukkme 8
No way that happens in canada
Space_Teddy 29
Would tell him the same thing I'm gonna stick up your ass if you ever dare to ask me such question again
andersonj219 5
People are messed up lol
trumpet27 1
Stupid. Sucks.But hilarious