Today, my friends and I held an intervention for my fiancé. He's been talking and behaving like an "old-timey cowboy" non-stop for the last three months. Our wedding is in a month and he refuses to marry me if I can't accept his "life choices." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after months of arguing and conflict, I broke up wIth my fiancé. Or at least, I tried to. The wedding's off, but only until he can convince me to want to marry him again. FML
Today, my fiancé told me that he was having second thoughts on our engagement. Instead of just calling it off, he took me to a fancy restaurant and took a public poll on whether we should get married. The majority said no. FML
Today, my fiance finally began seeing a therapist, after months of my begging him to. The therapist convinced him that he and I had "irreconcilable differences" so now he's asked for the ring back. FML
Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML
Today, I tried to talk to my soon-to-be-husband about how he needs to take a more active approach in his own life. It devolved to him screaming at me and putting words in my mouth. This has been going on for six months. FML
Today, at our wedding, instead of saying "I do", my fiancé paused before saying, "I can't do this", stepped down from the altar and proposed to my maid of honor. When she obviously refused, he ran from the venue bawling. He's not returning my calls. FML
Today, I got engaged. My family is already placing bets on how long it will take for my fiancée to "wise up and ditch" me. FML
Today, my fiancé called off our engagement after I contested his belief that women stop having periods after they are married. FML
Today, my fiancée called off our wedding out of the blue. After a long discussion about it, it turns out that last week I voiced an opinion about the wedding she didn’t agree with, and doesn’t want to spend her life married to someone who’s going to argue with her every five minutes. FML
Today, my fiancé refused to talk to me because I'm "an alcoholic". I only started drinking like this after we moved in together and he brought me alcohol every day, because he's an alcoholic. FML
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Top comments
saIty 17
Apparently behaving like an old timey cowboy is FROWNED UPON IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT!
HowAreYouToday 34
Well, at least old timey cowboys know how to please a woman :D
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Comments (130)
Enslaved 38
Tell him to stop or you'll be his "Huckleberry"! What do you want on your "Tombstone?":P
aspartame78 3
Pepperoni and sausage!
asdfghjklana 9
Yee haw.
perdix 31
Better than a Dallas Cowboy -- they suck!
Enslaved 38
Tsk tsk! Your hatred is showing. :P
perdix 31
Ah, yes, but if my Redskins were worth a shit, I could enjoy their success, instead of having to revel in the Cowboys' woes. What do they call that? Schadenfreude?
gc327072 31
A saint wouldn't be much better.
thatKidzmOm 10
Anything is better than the cowgirls ;-p even a saint. :)
olpally 33
The saints won last night!! :D
gc327072 31
^hell yea they won, olpally.
Enslaved 38
"Schadenfreude"! What a great word. They should put that on an "FML" T-shirt!(:
fmlallthetyme 23
Your reveling reminds me of why I do the same to every team in the NFL. Except the Bills, of course.
freshlybreezy 15
Perdix, I didn't know you were a 'skins fan too!
perdix 31
#75, yeah, even though Dan Snyder makes it hard. Sure Jack Kent Cooke was a prick, but he was a competent prick that could put a winner on the field. Dan the Fan is a prick that can't do anything right. He has to sell the team to someone who knows what he's doing!
Senseless_487 29
Sigh...try being a Chiefs fan.
perdix 31
#93, my condolences to you. You have to go back to the Lenny Dawson days to find something to cheer about. You'd have to be pretty old to do that.
Senseless_487 29
Yeah, that's before my time. Maybe one of these days, I'll have a reason to cheer again. Until then, I'll enjoy watching other teams lose even more.
aero_eng 2
"Save a horse ride a cowboy"?
gc327072 31
My friend always preferred the phrase "save a drum, bang a drummer."
YeniDewie 0
yihaaaaaa ... lol
lilhellian 27
yippee kai yay mother *******
sugarbear0727 19
There's nothing wrong with that. He's testing you, which you know, since you plainly stated that he said he wouldn't marry you if you couldn't accept him. Grow the **** up. At least he isnt trying to act like some stupid ass teen with fag swag.
buckdharma 38
enter him into a rodeo.
gracehi 33
I LOVE when my boyfriend talks like a cowboy!
bunny409 14
ugh. My boyfriend is going through a redneck phase...who knows how long hes going to go through it. Good luck op
chippa 24
People choose to be rednecks? I'm sorry to hear about that. :(