Today, I had to cancel an appointment due to diarrhea. I was so nervous that when the receptionist asked why, I told her, "I can't stop shitting." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I shat myself during a job interview. FML
Today, after a shopping trip, I had the worst diarrhea attack and almost shat my pants before I could even get in the front door. By the time I could get the door open, it was taking all of my self-control to keep from shitting myself. I had to shit on the toilet with the front door and bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, I was expecting a very important work call. Today was also the day I got insuppressible diarrhea. As I was running to the washroom, the phone rang. I didn't make it to the washroom or the phone. FML
Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML
Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I had a panic attack because I was constipated. FML
Today, my ass decided that it was the perfect day to exhibit the diarrhea side-effect of medicine I'm taking. I definitely made a lasting impression on my interviewer. FML
Today, my manager called me in to tell me I got the promotion I've been hoping for. He then said that since I didn't look excited about it he might have to rethink it. I was too busy concentrating on holding in diarrhea. FML
Today, I was at work alone with a stomach bug. For some reason, our bathroom was out of toilet paper, so I had to quickly run to the nearest store to buy more, only to shit my pants midway there. I'm pretty sure the cashier knew exactly what had happened. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
noobsatin 19
you know what they say, "honesty is the best policy."
SlugsOnDrugs 13
Don't worry OP, everyone has had to deal with it at some point in their life! On the other hand, at least you made some people laugh! Hope things improve for you
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (30)
noobsatin 19
you know what they say, "honesty is the best policy."
andrmac 25
I thought modesty was the best policy?
vikky538 29
And honestly it's not the best at that moment though
Magnoxidans 19
That's one way to dump the shitty news onto her...
ThunderLightTSV 31
You're not wrong though. Take some Imodium beforehand, maybe that'll help you survive.
claudiajean 24
From a medical view point, if you have diarrhoea it's normally for a reason and your body needs it out. Taking anything to stop it, can lead to the 'bugs' to stay in your gut and cause another, potentially worse, infection or illness. If possible, let yaself poo til your heart's content and reschedule :)
thatnucca 36
That's another way to de-stress...
NeneJPhilly 8
Well hell! it's the truth! Don't be ashamed of a normal bodily function. Haven't you heard? everybody poops.
cootiequeen4444 11
I had a bizarre book called 'everybody poops' as a young child. it was basically a bunch of animals pooping. plus people at the end or something. there was an everybody farts book too. same authors probably. i didn't have the fart one though. idk what happened to the poop book. I haven't seen it since I was a little kid... I bet it wouldn't be as funny as a remember it being though... OR maybe, sadly, it would be...
Lalala579121 28
7 - I'm pretty sure everyone who grew up at that time knows about that book.
SlugsOnDrugs 13
Don't worry OP, everyone has had to deal with it at some point in their life! On the other hand, at least you made some people laugh! Hope things improve for you
Tripartita 45
If you haven't already, I would recommend investing in a nice buttplug. They stop unwanted leakage, and some even come with tails!
metalcrazed 21
Ugh,I HATE YOU!!!!
spookyboy 20
Atleast you're not ******** her
FireCrotch4329 2
Sounds like you had a shitty day.
RichardPencil 32
You probably blew your chance to go on a date with her. If not, you're in for a steamy night. A Cleveland steamy night.