Today, it's my third day at work and the hazing finally began. After a few rounds of "punch the new guy", I thought I would finally be safe because the manager walked into the kitchen. He saw what was going on, picked up a handful of ketchup packets, and began throwing them at me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I started my first day at a job. First thing my manager does is ask me if I knew the fastest way to kill someone there, then told me with a straight face all of what would occur when dumping a person's head into the deep fryer. Then the psycho assigned me to the fry station. FML
Today, at my first day of work, I was impressing my trainer with my skills by carrying many trays at once. Well, I could until I came around a corner and ran into a customer. With food all over his front, he introduced himself to me as the head manager. FML
Today, it was my first day at the fire station. Naturally, we all went out and got lunch together. I normally don't handle spicy food well, but sucked it up. About ten minutes after we finished, I got up to do rookie duties when someone slapped me in the back. I forcefully vomited all over my new Lieutenant. FML
Today, I was working at my new job at a food court on campus. One of the supervisors came up to my station and told me that I "really look like someone who, through some miracle, accidentally found their way into college." He then threw a pickle at me. FML
Today, I started at my new job. Turns out my boss is a complete douchebag. He spent most of the day looking over our shoulders and making cuntish comments about our work, then called a guy a piece of shit for farting, and forced him to spray disinfectant on his chair. FML
Today, as usual, I worked at McDonald's. Although I tried to diffuse the situation, an old man was absolutely furious, and punched me in the face over BBQ sauce. FML
Today, it was my first day at work. They had me a large tray with lots of food on it, even after I told them I wasn’t comfortable carrying it. I hit the door on the way out of the kitchen, spilling everything on the tray, breaking two soup bowls and three salad plates. FML
Today, I learnt that the people I work with dislike me so much that they have a competition to see who can accidentally hurt me the most. How did I find out? A chef poured boiling water over my hands, and another shouted "50 POINTS!" FML
Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML
Today my Assistant Manager decided to pull a prank on me by walking up behind me and screaming my name. I screamed in terror and then swung around and punched him, full force, dead center in the chest, right in front of my supervisor, manager, and several other employees. FML
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Top comments
happyvalleygirl 0
fast food industry ftw
Kamazar 0
Run before he brings out the horseradish!
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Comments (78)
CL41RE 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
First bury me bitches
Poke_my_mon 0
Don't worry, I won't do it! This kind of enviornment is the BEST. Get through the hazing, and then its your turn to haze new people. If the manager is throwing ketchup packets, they're probably a chill manager, which is rare. Put your big boy panties on and man up, you ponty.
CL41RE 0
Ok sorry about the rude comment but I hate it when people freak out just because someone calls first. It's more annoying than the first person.
W33nie 0
yeah they're real whiners
allie2590 31
So now that we've all established that you're annoying, let's carry on with our day, shall we?
CL41RE 0
Really.
falconxvi 0
hahah ketchup throw =p haha u just got ur period all over ur face in ketchup lalaal woo
caelun 0
ahhahahhahaha
jjessen 20
77 there are so many things wrong with you sentence I don't know where to begin
rawr_ily96 24
#77 you're 20. Act like it. this is coming from a girl 3 years younger than you.
happyvalleygirl 0
fast food industry ftw
cwl727 33
What makes you think it was the fast food industry?
wchil 14
how do you know how old he is?
Kamazar 0
Run before he brings out the horseradish!
plexico 4
Day 4 Hazing in Ohio restaurants involves anal rape. Good luck with that.
screwtaylor 0
I bet Plexico wishes he could help with the anal raping, huh? :P
plexico 4
You'd lose. That's why I left Ohio before I had to take a restaurant job! FYI: Anal virginity intact. Yours?
YDIBITCHES 0
All hail Plexico FML GOD!!!!! I am not worthy thee is almighty god of life
YDIBITCHES 0
Screwtalor ultimate bitch of plexico. join the plexico religion
null_fml 11
Wow, I knew plexico had a fanclub, but a religion??
acd23 0
Wait, there's a fan club? How do I join? :P
allysonnn 0
throw a potato at them
Mefreh 0
I moderated this, and said no. THIS ISN'T FUINNY.
tubesocks_ 0
So did I. I normally only say 'Yes' to the ones that make me laugh. This one just made me feel bad for the guy.
hannah_elizabeth_fml 7
Agreed. this guy needs to grow a pair
Consequences 0
Report him to the district manager. That'll learn him. Even if he WANTED to join in, he should have faked maturity and acted like a manager.
liveandletlive89 0
Don't listen to this guy. If assholes keep reporting everything, no one will have any fun.
liveandletlive89 0
Wait, I replied to the wrong one. sorry, miss.
Daaniellee1234 8
bummer.
itzmeee 0
That's hilarious and sad. Depending on where you work, I'd probably quit. No one wants a boss and coworkers like that.
alex_vik 1
Wow, I'd quit that job right away.