Today, my swimming coach made us swim fifty laps non-stop as punishment for his previous class being unable to swim a drill properly. They're 8-11 year olds who are still learning to swim. I feel like my arms and legs are filled with lead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to go take swimming lessons because my mom has a fear I'll drown and I'm totally afraid of swimming anyway and never get anywhere near water. My instructor? A high school classmate of mine. My fellow swimming classmates? 5 and 6 year old kids. FML
Today, my swim coach had me swim a 400 meter freestyle. Feeling a little sick near the end, I lifted my head to breathe, then burped, and threw up violently all in the pool. All my team mates screamed horrified running out of the pool, and now they have to drain it. I was told not to come back. FML
Today, a new session started for my swimming squad. I walked down to the pool, tripped over a stray equipment bag, and belly-flopped into the pool in front of everyone, fully clothed. I'm the coach. FML
Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML
Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML
Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML
Today, while teaching swimming to a bunch of five year-olds, one particularly bratty girl decided she didn't want to swim and led the entire class to strike, leaving the pool empty, and me without a job. Apparently I was teaching the next world tyrant to swim. FML
Today, my entire gym class had to run the 1600 with our coach calling out finishing times. My finishing time was reported as "3 days short of a year." FML
Today, I swam in a race against all of the girls in the midwest in the hardest, longest, most grueling race you can swim. I won. Happy but so tired I could barely move, I looked up to see my time. I had been disqualified. For flinching. Before the race started. FML
Today, my dad taught me how to swim. I had to keep doing a lot of strange movements to keep my body floating. While doing that, two 8-year-old girls came and asked me if i needed help getting out of the water. I'm a 20 year old guy. FML
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Top comments
KingCeltic77 18
What an ass. Either way he's the teacher, it's his fault they can't swim.
ciumegu 6
Look on the bright side at-least you are building some muscle
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Comments (209)
KingCeltic77 18
What an ass. Either way he's the teacher, it's his fault they can't swim.
loloalltheway 23
Well obviously it's PARTLY his fault but the kids Will take their time to learn so cut the man some slack.
Futacy 30
Hi, I'm a horrible coach who can't teach 11 year olds how to float, so I'm going to take out my failure on you guys. but seriously, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger everyday.
ShannyAK 16
Oh god, I could imagine! Find a new teacher!
FMLKitten 15
Sounds like my swim coach. "2500 breast stroke. If you don't complete it by the end of practice, your going to do an extra 1000 butterfly." For those who don't know, a 2500 is 104 laps nonstop. Or 102, not quite sure. I'm quite used to it though, and I don't mind, he switched around the strokes, so...
Skyblu10 10
37, a 2500 is a max of 100 laps, assuming you're swimming 25m lengths. Although, my practices consist of 50m laps, so that would be a total of 50 laps. I know the feeling, our coach makes us swim a 3000 free for time.
12GaugeTurtle 1
Damn donkeys are corrupting society!
swimmerstud 7
Swimming 50 laps isn't hard at all...
IscoreOnU 19
116 it's really nothing. My practices consist of 4-6 miles each (2 hours) which I do back to back after school with dryland inbetween. 50 laps really isn't much.
DespairFaction 11
I don't really see anything wrong with making you guys swim more. Its only making you a better swimmer. Don't like swimming that much? Get off the team.
ejcskier 0
That's 100 lengths that's only 50 laps that is way easy I can do that In like 45 minutes
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
I feel your pain completely. One time when one kid was one minute late for practice, my coach made us all swim 12x200 fly on 2:55. It was so bad that after the 10th it didn't bother me because my body felt numb :/
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
Also, #24 you have no idea what you're talking about. If you don't swim you can't say that. Doing that much swimming continuously as punishment probably took away from time of their main set, which is prepared everyday to a certain goal. So it was probably really just a waste of time and probably just tired them out.
ciumegu 6
Look on the bright side at-least you are building some muscle
saintsrocksocks 10
Your profile picture. It's just... How do I put it. GAY.
ciumegu 6
You might of misunderstood my first comment I meant him and he stated that the class before him were 9 year olds.
boofgall 16
14- Congratulations, you look like a moron.
Pandacupcakelove 26
I've wondered how so many people on FML can afford an iPhone but not a shirt...
nerdstuck101 8
2- obviously photoshopped pic ... Believe me I have photoshop and one of the options is to make fake abs LOL
DerekCorbett 18
171 - and obviously yours are fake curves since I could apply them in 2 minutes using the liquify tool. Right?
boofgall 16
171- To be honest, your picture looks way more photoshopped than his does. Plus he's not making a ******* duck face.
ciumegu 6
Not photoshopped I'll be happy to post more if you don't believe me:D
Pandacupcakelove 26
Course you would...
ianbeef 11
That sucks I'm sorry. I hate swim coaches like that they are idiots.
saintsrocksocks 10
I guess you've been exposed to many swim coaches of that kind?
TourettesGuyFTW 26
My old swimming teacher was Derren Brown's (magician) dad. That's ny claim to fame. Now thumb me down bitches, I don't give a shit, I can swim!!!
IscoreOnU 19
I've been swimming for 10+ years and I have had amazing coaches and terrible ones. I just call op a pussy. This is how you get great. Regardless of who's "fault" it was stop complaining and do it. Isn't that why you are there? To get better.
Llama_Face89 34
105- I think they should have done MORE! You're doing that much already just make it a 1650.
philipino 24
105- That's pretty awesome that you're gonna be in Rio 2016. And yes, I did creep your profile.
therealslim 15
154- don't believe everything you read. Selection for the Olympics is a few months before the start of the games.. This guy could be any old chump claiming to go the Olympics. It would be interesting to see his profile in 4 years time.. Good luck to him anyway
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
105- which swim team are you on? I am 14 and I swim in the senior group ( with 17-18 year olds) for my club because I'm pretty good too if I do say so myself. Also 105, have you made senior nats?
IscoreOnU 19
169- I would have made senior Nara this year had my shoulder not fallen apart and had to have surgery on it. Ah well you get dealt what you do I'm back on it now though
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
I see
PvtParts417 15
That coach is a dick.
FMLKitten 15
I didn't know penises could coach swim teams, let alone swim.
kooochris1995 14
83- mine can.
miianah1 22
For future reference, #83, you're supposed to say "I didn't know penises could swim, let alone teach swim class". The harder activity goes after.
teresee 8
Wow, that's unfair.
cassidy0922 6
At least you got a lot of practice in.
hqbrat 8
I love you profile pic ❤❤
cassidy0922 6
Thank you!
saintsrocksocks 10
If it doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger.
saintsrocksocks 10
I guess it builds character?
Futacy 30
19- nah, polio can kill you. btw, i think he meant it makes you stronger-willed.
saintsrocksocks 10
I've never heard of a case where polio killed. Would you please enlighten me?
Futacy 30
26- about ten percent of patients died because it paralyzed their breathing muscles. (may they rest in peace)
saintsrocksocks 10
I'll have to learn more about this. Sounds like an interesting subject. Not the killing part.
StayClassyLassy 6
Polio killed John F. Kennedy.
Tuffay 14
My Aunt in 1979! How's that?
StayClassyLassy 6
I meant Franklin D. Roosevelt! So embarrassed.
perdix 31
And if it kills you, it doesn't matter anymore.
superapplesauce 2
FALSE: aids....
Futacy 30
187- aids does kill people, but just slowly. (srry if i've offended anyone)
soccergurrll 8
Ok Kelly clarkson! Haha. No? Ok. I'll just go in the corner now...
Lexi_princess 3
Throw your coach in the pool and make him do laps.
soccergurrll 8
Tell him to get his ass in the water and swim 50 laps
swimmerstud 7
50 laps is nothing.
andiewithlove 21
Water you waiting for? Get swimming!:D
slurshies 11
no.
pokefan813 16
Yes!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Maybe...