Today, I was house-sitting. A lady came to the door and demanded to know whose white car was in the drive. It was mine. She said she had video proof of me hitting her mailbox. I panicked, asked how much it was. She said $200. Later I checked my car. No damage. Impossible angle. I gave $200 to a strange old lady. With no proof. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a car hit me. I didn't get hurt, but someone called 911. The old woman who had hit me got out of the car with no problem to look at me, and gets back into the car. When the police arrive, she pulls out crutches and said I made strange faces and made her hit me. I got blamed. FML
Today, I dinged my boss's very expensive car. My car wasn’t damaged, so in a panic, I moved my car to another spot and said nothing. Less than an hour later, my boss showed me high definition security footage, so now I either cough up repair money I can’t afford, or I get fired. FML
Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML
Today, I got a call from the police informing me that my car was involved in an accident outside my house. At least I can prove I was in another continent when it happened. FML
Today, some guy hit my car and then threatened to sue me for "parking my car in such a way that it was impossible not to hit it." My car was in the driveway. FML
Today, I accidentally bumped into another car on the road. The worst of the damage was a slight chip to the other driver's paint, but she played it up so much that she ended up being taken away in an ambulance. I'm now terrified that the crazy bitch is going to sue me. FML
Today, I moved in with an older gentleman renting out a room. Tonight, he had a domestic dispute with his girlfriend, who threw a lawn chair at my car. FML
Today, I was driving when a woman started crossing the street against the light at the upcoming intersection, so I slammed on the brakes and stopped short of hitting her. That's when she intentionally jumped onto my car and started screaming that I had "mowed her down". The cops believed her. FML
Today, I was leaving my friends' apartment in my mom's car and I backed into a fire hydrant. I lied and told my mom it was a hit and run. So she called the apartment complex. They had me on video hitting the fire hydrant. FML
Today, I got into an accident and my bike broke. My insurance expired 5 days ago and the accident wasn't even my fault. The lady was on the phone and on the wrong side of the road. She's threatening to sue me even though her car is in better condition. There are no witnesses and no cameras either. FML
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Top comments
The_Real_Cvh 10
You hit my mailbox too. And it was a fancy one. Set me back $350. I’m on my way over to pick up the cash.
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Gotta say, that was pretty dumb of you.
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Comments (3)
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Gotta say, that was pretty dumb of you.
The_Real_Cvh 10
You hit my mailbox too. And it was a fancy one. Set me back $350. I’m on my way over to pick up the cash.
BurnInDemonFire 39
There's a sucker born every minute. If it didn't occur to you to check your car until AFTER you gave her the money, that's your own fault.