Today, my mom realized we have been sharing tooth brushes because they are similar colors. I told her it doesn't really matter since we're mother and daughter. She responded by saying that she loves me, but she has no idea where my mouth has been, and she doesn't want my diseases. Thanks mom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my brother came out of the shower and sat with my mom and me on the couch. He then says he liked the idea of the extra toothbrush in the shower, it helps him clean between his toes. I have been using that to brush my teeth for the last two weeks. FML
Today, as always, my mom loudly asked me if I'd brushed my teeth, then replied to my yes with, “I don’t believe you.” All because I forgot to brush my teeth once when I was 5. I’m 17 now. FML
Today, I found out everyone in my family thought the red toothbrush was theirs, and that all four of us have been using the same toothbrush for months. FML
Today, my mom said that if I wasn't her daughter, she probably wouldn't even like me. FML
Today, I caught my mom using my toothbrush and washcloth again, despite her having both her own bathroom and supplies. I asked her to please not use mine, to which she called me an ungrateful bitch. My dad agreed. Yet they wonder why I've been desperately saving money to move out. FML
Today, I found out my whole family has been mistakenly using the same toothbrush for over a month. FML
Today, I changed my toothbrush because the bristles were wearing down. My brother later asked me why I changed his toothbrush. Apparently we've been sharing the same one for the past several weeks. FML
Today, I overheard my mom telling my younger sister not to use my razors because she "doesn't know what I may have." FML
Today, my 45 year-old sister blamed my parents yet again for losing one tooth after the other because they did not tell her to brush her teeth before going to bed. It's general knowledge, honey. And somehow, I still have all my teeth. FML
Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML
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Top comments
MAGNAVOX 0
She has a point, who knows what has been in your mouth!
lizamaphone 6
whether you're related or not, you still have germs! that's nasty!
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Comments (68)
RufusCade 7
There are two things I don't even want to share with my wife, and those are tooth brush and towel. This is a woman who's pussy I ate last night, but I would never share a tooth brush with her. (The towel thing I have a problem with myself....)
GDIalex 11
Well, I've heard the same about hairbrushes - that it is just an individual thing for separately use. Not because you have bacterias or diseases in your head ( =) ), but because of scurf and micro-wounds on your head, so that you can change a small amounts of blood with the one, who are you sharing your hairbrush with. (sorry for repeating the words).
stewpididiot 11
what ?
scremanie 0
They're saying that there are little tiny cuts on your head, and when you share a brush, the blood from your scalp passes on to the next person, and your blood could go into theirs, which could result in the other person getting an infection or disease... like aids.
5t3ff1k4h 45
I honestly didn't know that. I thought it was mainly because of lice... that's really interesting!
Flounder 2
I never understood the "but we're related! We have the same germs!" argument. Genetics has nothing to do with the transmission of contagious diseases; it's not you're suddenly immune to catching mono just because it's an infected blood relative you're exposed to.
DjeePee 25
This. Sharing tooth brushes is like sharing dirty underwear. Gross.
Spastastic 6
Same here. I'll share a drink with someone or use someone else's toothbrush regardless of whether or not we're related. :D
GDIalex 11
oh, and yes, I've forgotten to tell you. In Soviet Russia we don't usually use tooth brushes, since we have fingers to clean our teeth.
Prolusive 5
In Soviet Russia, teeth clean you!
NarwhalLove 0
ewwww do you know where peoples hands have been there more dirty then the mouth if anything ur just making ur teeth more dirty and ur not getting invetween I can understand like if u forgot ur toothbrush so u use a finger like a couple times but everyday? u guys must get alot of cavities
GDIalex 11
#99 - Do you really take it on trust when you hear something weird about Russian people? DAFUQ, we are normal, it's just a joke :) Or is it me, being naive enough to not to understand sarcastic tone :)
elmorous 0
right back atcha MOM!
Trollz4daLULZ 2
YDI for having a toothbrush, for having teeth, for sucking enough dick in public restrooms to cause your mom to worry about the gonnoherpesyhillAIDS in your mouth, for having a mouth, and for having a mom.
scremanie 0
LMAO!
elwilberto 3
how's your dad taste?
pariah13 0
that's not all your sharing now...
TRACKGiRLJONNi 0
shucks, I shoulda thought of this earlier but, sharing is caring :D
pyrodude185 0
my dick was in her mouth now I have a ******* rash lol