Today, I met my new roommate. She severely struggled with pronouncing my name, and decided that to save time and the effort, she's just going to call me what she thinks my name sounds like: Lube. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my new roommate. I also met her stuffed animals, who introduced themselves to me. My roommate makes inanimate objects talk. FML
Today, I started a new job. The supervisor handed me a badge with the name 'Rachel' on it, which is not my name. When I told her this, she responded with, "I know, but it will be easier for the customers to pronounce than your actual name." FML
Today, my flatmate wanted to introduce me to his new friend, saying we'd, "get along great". Within the first half hour, she'd used the word "lit" eight times, and dabbed four times. FML
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML
Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML
Today, my new roommate took a shower. This would be a good thing, except for the fact that it's apparently taken her two months just to take this one. I have to live with her for another year. FML
Today, my first day at the job, I went up to my coworker and began to ask her name. She cut me off and snapped, “I have a name.” FML
Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
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Top comments
gunmania0 12
What the hell is your name!?
jake1632 9
Jake..... But I go by Robert
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Comments (235)
Leftieswillrule 3
OP's name could be Lupe and if the roommate is from an Eastern European country, she'd probably try to pronounce it "loop" which compounded with an accent would sound like Lube
nomnom5559922 0
Look on the bright side...now you don't need any :)
ih82bl8 2
Lubiandria?
FarSide 23
No, "Lickmyneckandiwillbelubedup".
MufMuf_fml 5
Is your name Lubert? If not then idk how your roommate came up with Lube o.O
hersheybar100 10
Wait so what is ur name??? is ur name really that hard or is ur roommate just that lazy? lol
Bruce_Lee 0
LOL
psychiatrist_fml 4
They were probably just being funny... or not.
choose8 0
jake1632 You look just like my ex bf who's your age and his name is jake... not you but still, 0.0
MeekaMew 1
Her name is Louisiana. Look near the top right , it has her name ( somewhere near the top)
xx_dRaMAQuEen_xx 0
she's from Louisiana it says posted by anonymous from Louisiana.
duckman9 55
According to a recent survey performed amongst our fellow commenters here, her name must be Luke!
ravenevercross 19
You're an idiot. How would you get lube from Louisiana? Would like to know OPs real name though.
neongurl98 10
Is your name Luke? But that's still funny!