Today, I met my new roommate. She severely struggled with pronouncing my name, and decided that to save time and the effort, she's just going to call me what she thinks my name sounds like: Lube. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my new roommate. I also met her stuffed animals, who introduced themselves to me. My roommate makes inanimate objects talk. FML
Today, I started a new job. The supervisor handed me a badge with the name 'Rachel' on it, which is not my name. When I told her this, she responded with, "I know, but it will be easier for the customers to pronounce than your actual name." FML
Today, my flatmate wanted to introduce me to his new friend, saying we'd, "get along great". Within the first half hour, she'd used the word "lit" eight times, and dabbed four times. FML
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML
Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML
Today, my new roommate took a shower. This would be a good thing, except for the fact that it's apparently taken her two months just to take this one. I have to live with her for another year. FML
Today, my first day at the job, I went up to my coworker and began to ask her name. She cut me off and snapped, “I have a name.” FML
Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
gunmania0 12
What the hell is your name!?
jake1632 9
Jake..... But I go by Robert
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (235)
rawrface22 10
A
gunmania0 12
What the hell is your name!?
jake1632 9
Jake..... But I go by Robert
jayalexander 7
I see what you did there... nice
KiddNYC1O 22
29- PM him then. He kind of looks like the lead singer of PWTs.
KiddNYC1O 22
Seriously, quit threadjacking.
jake1632 9
Haha yeah jay, and kiddnyc I never noticed that. and last and least, heehees either my detectors are broken, or your cyberflirting with a 14 year old.
jake1632 9
And thanks kiddnyc I was about to say the same
epiclife101 0
I bet it is summit like luke or summit thats the closest to lube
epiclife101 0
It might b luke
amayalives4music 1
Yes.
YouDaIdiot 4
*something
gchartier90 0
yeah but who can't pronounce luke
swimmer3141 10
But Luke isn't any harder to pronounce than Lube would be.
diego2k5 6
I think the be might be Lupe. Spanish name but makes sense
gideeupp 9
Lube, I am your father. (;
Yodaevil 4
Lube Buttraider? Star wars gone wrong! Lol
j4gerb0mblitz 6
LUPÈ...?
livin_life_large 0
agreed!!
metallicatime 0
Hey my name is ****** Luke!!!! Don't call me lube!!!!
angela44 0
Haha , funny (:
coffeygirl12 14
Im naming my cat lube.
Slim2306 10
My name is Muslim.... people still have trouble pronouncing it. My science teacher got confused and once called me Islam and wouldn't believe me when I told her my real name was Muslim.
rdvfyubuyg 1
Luke? I think but Lube and Luke sounds like the same xD
multiplecoloredc 0
If it's a girl, her name might be Lupè. (Loopay) xD
fadingfaith 4
It's actually Loo-peh
Amrel 10
Summit? Girl you have me more lost than waldo
FarSide 23
Well, "Lube" IS easier to pronounce than "Anonymous"...
itsharkley 8
NOO!!! THAT'S NOT TRUE
aFatFuck 0
Just wondering why there are so many 12, 13, an 14 year olds on here? Not hating, I just remember this site used to have a lot older people (like 20s so not actually old).
2ndSucks 15
Why does it matter?.. Im not trying to be rude, just wondering.
Llamassss 21
131- Summit means something. It's what they say in England.
kewlkate 9
It's a natural question for most people. We want to know THE TRUTH!! :D
123Lalala098 10
:P lawls
123Lalala098 10
xP well I just hope they are the same age as you and not 32 year old men behind a screen. ( :P btw 14 year old female, from canada, eh)
gopherguy 0
23- Interesting how your "girlfriend" shows up on google images when you search "hot girl dirtbike" ;) (yes I looked it up lol)
ThatsSOBforshort 2
Lmfao!!!
countrygirl1112 0
Your 14
morbidX 4
If we followed those rules then there wouldn't be half as much people here, if they didn't make those rules, what fun would it be to break them?
fadingfaith 4
Age doesn't change someone's maturity level.
ChickenInMyKitch 4
23 JUST GOT EXPOOOOOSED BY 143
Skyanne 11
Too bad the actual quote is, "No. I am your father." FYL.
dun1 3
I know a girl named Liuba...
babyydolly 0
148- lol I looked it up too and yeah she's on google images XD
smileyxo4 5
148- I love you. Thats hilarious. 152- you're*
nicki10123 0
Ikr
nubx 0
What?
AaronTkr 0
can't be Luke. OP says roommate is a she, and guys can't have female roommates.
ukrage 1
so ur a Jew right?
chrstygrl06 10
Her name might be Lubelle. I know someone with that name. It was more popular in the old days.
jacksteadi 0
Her roomate
zinoxity 23
76 - If you're doing a reference to starwars, take note: In starwars they said "No, I am your father." they never said "Luke, I am your father."
awesomeooo3 0
#143 I'm from England and no one I know says "summit" instead of "something".
Mipz 2
No one american actually says it that way.
AgentSmith79 9
And you don't know the difference between "your" and "you're".
Kingkiwi 5
Lol tht was so well done
SexyQueen0905 24
A new generation!
SexyQueen0905 24
That was aimed at #140
JustHello123 1
haha poor guy!
lexiemae97 9
Ok so I know this guy's comment is near the top but I just gotta say this... Jake1632 your 14? me too... I like your pic ;)
organicmtdew 0
A summit is Tge top of a mountain. Hagrid and David Brent say "summat," which I believe is what you meant.
RennaeUK 0
Says at the top of the screen her name is luciana or something like that a
qwerta_fml 0
why does that matter? I'm 13 and like to think that I have better grammar (and spelling) than some of the older people on the site p.s.what's your name at the top you are totally hot (I unlike some can say that without being creepy) because I'm 13 and not 25. k. out
raphanne_fml 33
#225 He said his name was Jake or Robert. You might be able to spell correctly but you need to work on your reading skills...
ihavetopoopnow 2
boob?
Gotrees 0
43, why do you have a roommate if you're only 14?
tjracer10 0
Your mom.
PaperNinja 0
Wait your 14 ? Same i just put my age as 18 :) x
Kiyaralovestolol 14
Probably Luke.
saIty 17
YDI for having the name Lupiyrefhutfhjudg.
ohjessica 11
I don't think that is her name...
KiddNYC1O 22
4, you smoking.
saIty 17
I guess I just have a strange sense of humor.
jake1632 9
Salty, your picture happened to me once.
saIty 17
Omg were you also probed by aliens?
Yodaevil 4
The party wouldn't be the same without lube!
jake1632 9
Salty I think so. Were you there with me on that foggy august 3rd?
saIty 17
Yeah, I was room 3, where I was tied down and forced to listen to Friday, after my probing.
jake1632 9
I was in room 3 toooo! then they like had avatar sex all over again.. but it's pretty hard to enjoy personal porno after having three crooked things shoved up your bootyhole...
MegansSexy145 6
thats hot lmao:)
MegansSexy145 6
btw jake ur hot to js:)
morbidX 4
Salty, your name is sour. Aren't I sweet for being so bitter? I amuse myself.
TroyDropShotz 0
4. you just made my day lol
Komakom 4
Well I thought your joke was funny :)
tuxedoandex 28
the party don't start till lube walks in
knights95 9
What's your name?
danishbagel 3
Probably Luke.
Sweej 1
This FML would be so much funnier if the OP's name was something simple. Example: "Today, I met my new roommate. She couldn't pronounce my name, so she decided to go with something close: Lube. My name is Mike. FML"
JoeTheMan12 0
it would not be Luke because op said the roommate is a she and that means she's a girl too...
MizzErikaHart 8
Is it pube?
sup_bitch 0
It could be lupe. I thonk thats how you spell it....dont know forsure
Googolman 29
Who said roommates can't be opposite genders?
Pacers13 11
It really depends on where they are roommates at
MaloPero 4
what is your name? Lubricanta?:)
Sweej 1
It might be Luke... But that isn't hard to pronounce... Or it could be Lube and he's been pronouncing it wrong all this time!
CatEyes66 0
Cop: Who did it? Roomate: "LUBE" Roomate: Oh, sorry your name slipped out. Lube: Damn it!
cameron_natasha 0
legit lol'd there haha nice one
dun1 3
Liuba maybe??
StevenJ94 1
That's what I'll name my first-born child. Thank you!
ReptarSwag 4
i feel bad for that kid...
rattusrattus 19
I once knew a girl who was contemplating calling her future child Chlamdyia [sp?]. She was 14 at the time though, so hopefully when she DOES have children... OP, after a few tries, I would have come up with a cool nickname. Like Dumbledore or something.
raphanne_fml 33
A friend of mine is called Aurore but English speakers can't pronounce her name and call her "error", "horror" or "*****"...
YoLauryn 0
That should interesting if your friends ever call and your not there, "lube is not in right now"
genesisnirvana 11
"he slipped out for a few minutes."
YoLauryn 0
Haaaaa!
Sweej 1
Lmao @ 36... I usually don't laugh at puns, but that one was pretty funny.
KiddNYC1O 22
"What? Lube is behind you, silly!"
whisperingeye13 0
lubes knocking on my back door right now!
jake1632 9
What could I do without you lube?! Oh lube you make everything so much easier. You wouldn't be where you are if it weren't for lube. Lube made Dick Fitwell. Lube makes jokes really hard to make..
icyfire617 10
Lmao! :D
jake1632 9
110 111 lmao at who?
ChibiMONSTER 0
Yikes! That sux
jake1632 9
Yikes! That sux
Captain0bv10us 0
Yikes! That sux
iJasper 8
Lol xD What is your First Name?!
jake1632 9
Robert
starlight89 4
She's just messing with you