Today, I met my new roommate. She severely struggled with pronouncing my name, and decided that to save time and the effort, she's just going to call me what she thinks my name sounds like: Lube. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my new roommate. I also met her stuffed animals, who introduced themselves to me. My roommate makes inanimate objects talk. FML
Today, I started a new job. The supervisor handed me a badge with the name 'Rachel' on it, which is not my name. When I told her this, she responded with, "I know, but it will be easier for the customers to pronounce than your actual name." FML
Today, my flatmate wanted to introduce me to his new friend, saying we'd, "get along great". Within the first half hour, she'd used the word "lit" eight times, and dabbed four times. FML
Today, In my science class I sit next to my friend Jill. My teacher always gets our names confused calling me Jill and her Liz. She decided to combine our names. I'm now known as Jizz. My teacher clearly has no idea what it means. FML
Today, after pranking my roommate several times by putting lube in his hand sanitizer bottle, he got me back by putting sanitizer in my lube. FML
Today, after meeting my girlfriend's family and trying my hardest to impress them, she told me that they came up with a nickname for me. My new name is "Matt the Doormat." FML
Today, my new roommate took a shower. This would be a good thing, except for the fact that it's apparently taken her two months just to take this one. I have to live with her for another year. FML
Today, my first day at the job, I went up to my coworker and began to ask her name. She cut me off and snapped, “I have a name.” FML
Today, I woke up to my creepy new roommate licking my cheek. FML
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
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Top comments
gunmania0 12
What the hell is your name!?
jake1632 9
Jake..... But I go by Robert
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Comments (235)
lacrossegirl775 0
What's your name..?
u1ose 2
That's a slippery situation.
CallieCC 8
Lubert?
VeraJK 16
Lol, what's your name?
lubenceto 1
I guess her name is something like Lyubomira or Lyubena. These are Eastern-european names. Like, for example my name is Lyubomira, and most of my friends call me Lyuba or Lyub, and in case it's the latter it sounds like Lube. And yes, there are a lot of Eastern-european girls that go to the US. That name can be found in Russia, Croatia, Serbia, in my country - Bulgaria and a few more. So there, you go, mystery solved.
HondaKidd 5
But... But.... OP's from Louisiana
lubenceto 1
Maybe she studies there, idk.
MaRi3_ZaN3 0
wats ur name? ;o
ArielTheMermaid 17
So what's your name??
mofran 0
use it to your advantage , one night say, hey I'm in the mood, we don't need lube,.. cause I was born lube. sorry shitty joke :p all I could think of
jake1632 9
i was in room 3 toooo! then they like had avatar sex all over again.. but its hard to enjoy personal porno after having a three crooked things shoved up your bootyhole...
wild_n_out 8
I literally vomited after reading this shitty joke
samikitty961 8
Lupe?
yrkamurka 4
could be luby or lubertha