Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of water, a car pulled onto the sidewalk and bumped into me. Not just any car; my dad's car. He then drove away. FML
Today, while out for a jog, I noticed that you never know how fast you run until you're being followed by someone in a car you don't know, and they're continuously honking at you. I later found out it my dad in his new car. FML
Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML
Today, as I was walking home from school with my guy friends, my dad pulled up by the sidewalk, offered me a handful of dollar bills and said, "Get in, baby." Only after we drove away and he started laughing did I realize I'll probably never hear the end of this at school. FML
Today, I went for a run when my shin splints acted up, so I called my dad to have him come pick me up. When I saw his car approaching, I stuck out my thumb like a hitchhiker, as a joke. The car pulled over to give me a ride. It wasn't my dad. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up to take me on a date. Just as we were about to drive away, my dad ran out of the house in his underwear and started yelling that he'd kill my boyfriend if I wasn't back home within the hour. FML
Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML
Today, my dad was driving me to college. I'd cracked a joke about how old people like him shouldn't be allowed to drive, and I guess he took it personally, what with him speeding straight up to the parking lot wall, and only braking after I started shrieking in terror. FML
Today, I watched The Omen with my father. Halfway through driving me back home, he stopped the car and made me get out right there in a rough part of town. Fifteen minutes later, he drove up beside me, laughed hysterically at how terrified I was, and told me to get in. FML
Today, as I was walking home, I saw an ambulance pull into my driveway with its sirens blaring. Thinking it could be for my sick father, I started frantically sprinting. I managed to trip on my pant-leg, twisting my ankle in the process. They were just turning around in my driveway. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
WolfKing501 0
Fun dad you got their lol
Thanatos1206 0
That's when you slash his tires and leave a note saying "Are you tired of driving?"
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (218)
tye719 0
lol your a real life version of Meg from family guy!
Daederoth 10
ha
NickAdenhart34 3
when he is old and is probably crapping himself, you should ask, are you tired of crapping yourself? then if he says yes say, well then try pissing your self
george84 0
I can't tell you how many times my dad did this with me in the car as a child. the difference was, he did it to random people.
pinklover222 0
haha... I could totally see my dad doing that. :/
robberry 11
Funny for us, sucks for you!
narutou546 4
lmao I know how you feel
electricmaster 0
HAHAHA Your dad is hilarious :'D
abethehonest 4
problem?
maximiliano760 0
hahaha wud of done the same