Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was riding the subway, reading a book, when a woman suddenly shoved a flyer over my book. Aghast by her rude gesture, I declined to take the paper. I looked over and noticed it was a flyer for a missing girl. FML
Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML
Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML
Today, my friend and I were driving to work, when she asked me to stop at the gas station. Ten minutes later, I see this woman come out, my friend right behind her. The woman spotted me, an intense look in her eyes. She marched over, threw a paper at me, and screamed, "Jesus died for our sins!" She then stormed off. I'm a crazy magnet. FML
Today, I was walking on the street when a woman in front of me dropped a couple of dollars. I picked them up and chased her to return it all. She insisted that it wasn't hers. I tried to tell her it was, but she wouldn't accept it. A cop saw me and arrested me for solicitation. FML
Today, I was at the mall, when I saw an elderly lady drop her groceries, so I rushed over to help her pick them up. She took one look at me, called me a "Liberal bastard," and shouted for me to get away from her before she called the cops. FML
Today, in a crowded store, I waved at someone who looked familiar. The woman frowned, looked behind her, then back at me, and said, “Do I know you?” I panicked and said, “Yes… spiritually?” She walked away faster than I’ve ever seen flee. FML
Today, I saw an elderly woman struggling to reach the top shelf in my local grocery store, so I went over and asked if she needed help. She then accused me of flirting with her and had me escorted from the property. FML
Today, I spotted a $100 bill on the ground. Being a little strapped for cash, I excitedly picked it up. I discovered it was one of those religious tract papers made to look like a folded bill, with a message scolding me for being greedy. FML
Today, I bumped into a lady, apologised and tried to continue on. She screamed assault and tried to citizen's arrest me. I've got better things to do, so I ignored her but she latched onto my leg like a toddler. I ended up dragging this insane woman up the street until she finally let go. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
melij99 5
It's a simple rule my friend: Treat others the way you would like to be treated.
ManInTheMachine 20
You should probably listen to what someone has to say before you snap at them. I can gurantee she tried to say something, and wasn't just thrusting paper in your face.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (105)
Betterthink4 6
JACKASS!
doglover100 29
They will follow you around a lot. Around the holidays one year my brother and his friend got chased by someone working those carts in the middle of the mall, to buy something.
HannahtheRunner 0
Karmas a bitch isn't it?
Bekll 31
Good on you for avoiding the preachers. Shame on you for misjudging someone who only was trying to help.
chinagirl3343 8
Ydi. Shame on you! Just throw the stuff out. No need to be rude!!!
Pensu 12
That sucks for both you and her, but I can't blame you for seeing red in that situation. Hopefully you had a chance to apologize and explain yourself.
kassafrass 4
How do you know it was hate propaganda?
jonsey974 3
Kinda can't blame OP. So many religious protestors act as radical and thoughtless as westboro baptist anymore...
eviltwigster 7
can't stand the rundle mall preachers, I was there last night shopping for some friends and it is so annoying, they give all christians such a bad name :/
DogStew 20
haha! oh man! you are king asshole of the day. that's funny! haha! I hope you apologized. :-)