Today, my 15 year-old son told me he had his first kiss. I told him how I was the same age when I had mine, and then I told him all kinds of wild stories about things I did in my childhood and college life. Truth is, I made them all up. I didn't get kissed till I was 24, and laid till I was 28. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my sister had her first kiss. She was very excited and she told me all about it. She then asked me to tell her about the first time I kissed a guy, what it was like, who it was with, etc. I had to make one up. I have never been kissed before. My sister is 6 years younger than me. FML
Today, my mom bitched me out in front of my friends because I had my first kiss at "such a young age". She's 15 years older than me. FML
Today, I told my friends I was kissed by a girl. They said "Yeah, probably by your mom." The sad thing is, they were right. FML
Today, I had my first kiss. It would have been great if I wasn't playing spin the bottle as a 23-year-old. FML
Today, I'm nearly 30 years-old, and not only am I still a virgin, I've never even had my first kiss. FML
Today, I had my first kiss standing in front of my front door. It was really cute, the way you normally think about first kisses. When I got inside, I realized my mom had been watching out of her second story bedroom window, taking pictures. She put them on Facebook captioned, "My baby's first kiss!" FML
Today, I'm 20 years old and never been kissed. FML
Today, I was babysitting a five year-old boy. Somehow the topic of relationships came up, and he asked me if I had a boyfriend. When I told him that I was single, he got all excited and asked if he could be my boyfriend. It would have been cute… except he was the first guy to ever ask me out. I'm 18. FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, I made out with a guy that I had just met at a party. It was my first kiss. I don't know what's worse, the fact that my first kiss is at the age of 23, or the fact that I saw him making out with a different girl later on in the night. FML
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Top comments
automatedeffemel 0
Why would you even lie about that? I don't understand parents that worry more about looking cool to their kids rather than being a good role model to them.
fatherpunk 1
You didn't have to lie. Your son didn't ask you about anything. You could of said "sweet!" and moved on.
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Comments (143)
MagneticGuitar 0
Atleast you are settled now. So its alright.
42billybob 5
that's only sad if you were actively trying to get kissed all those 24 years, and laid those 28. if it's been from keeping chaste that's a heavy duty accomplishment, and you have more self-control than more than half of the American population. lying about it is pretty sad though. FYL because you're so insecure about it.
RFreedom 0
ydi for being a liar.
teiso_fml 0
YDI for thinking it even matters.
MysteryJoker 5
YDI for not wanting your kid to do better than you...and for lying about it. Can't forget that part.
eoghanface 0
Peeps lie too much, theres simple shit thats easy to get your head around like simply not lying to your kids, and not being a ********, what is it that people dont get this shit?
RagePX 0
lol everyone here talkin bout "waiting for it" is a moron ! ure just to ****** nerdish to get jiggy !!!!
Sugarlips_xo 0
Booooooooooooooo go apologize and tell him the truth. Raise him with some morals. $tup!dfuck$, good women like morals.
dudeitsdanny 10
People who refer to morals as a general, objective concept is more of a stupid*** =)
Neferria 0
Way to be a great role model. He'll go off thinking, "Since my dad did it, I can, too!"
Sarunas23 0
i feel sorry for you... TIP: ALWAYS TELL THE TRUTH!!!