Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said, "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML
Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML
Today, my boyfriend has been super nice to me all day and I was enjoying the attention. At bedtime, he asked me if I was happy, I said yes, he asked if was I happy enough to try butt stuff. I said no, like I do every time he asks for butt stuff. He turned over and went to sleep. So much for being nice. FML
Today, I woke up to my boyfriend repeatedly whispering in my ear, "You want to give me a blowjob". Yes, he actually thought it would work. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML
Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML
Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML
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Top comments
Kamon97 23
Maybe he was really tired? :s
EdenCrystal 21
This isn't really relevant but next time he does this you should say "Fine, then can you give me one?" and see his reaction
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Comments (137)
ClearSkyGuy 6
At least he can go to sleep, I'm stuck with Insomnia.
OleReliable 7
I always want a *******...always
Hiding_from_you 2
Did you boil his kitten before retiring to bed?
jessiejamesp 11
There has to be something wrong with your boyfriend I'm sorry friend but no guy in there right mind would say no to a ********. A guy could of just got shot in the chest and still if a girl asked him if he wanted one he would say yes
danny_doom27 6
gay.plain and simple.That is the only explanation possible because no straight man would ever turn down a good ol' bj even if you were terrible at it
coco0619 5
Just wait till your married.
benbunte 7
Is he human?