Dumbass
Today, my drunk boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to light a firework in the back seat of my car while we were driving down the interstate. FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to light a firework in the back seat of my car while we were driving down the interstate. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML
Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML
Today, my friend and his girlfriend got in a fight while drunk and he started walking home. While driving around looking for him, I accidentally hit him with my car. FML
Today, my boyfriend thought it'd be a good idea to break up with me in his car. I had to walk home. FML
Today, my car broke down. My boyfriend, who is not too handy, insisted on fixing it. He called me outside and said he was done and started the engine. Moments after rejoicing, it burst into flames. FML
Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend drive my car, knowing that he doesn't have a license. While he was out, he ran a stop sign, collided with another vehicle, and then left the scene of the accident. Then he lied to me about how the accident happened so I "wouldn't be so upset." FML
Today, my drunk boyfriend decided to try to serenade me by throwing rocks at my window and singing a song about how much he loves me. This would have been extremely sweet if he would have gotten my window instead of my dad's. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in his car when things got hot and heavy and we decided to climb in the back. After we finished we started to put our clothes back just as a someone's brights flooded into the car. It was a cop, and he had been there the entire time. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
butterfly141989 0
you should have kicked his a** to the curb (literally and figuratively speaking)
rmujerita 0
i hope u made him walk after that
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (109)
rc024 0
That must have been a good show in the back seat hahahahaha
untoldfame 3
your boyfriend is made of win.
hunny_kat 0
Hahahaha agreed!
harmony88 0
My exact thoughts!
lynnesey 0
no lie.
CrunkCupcake97 2
He's a keeper.
cattoe7 0
thats what i was going to say
iphonebro 0
I blew out my ear with a mini TNT stick
b00stFeD 0
I agree with 14.
LeedsFML 0
You're boyfriend sounds like a tool. Probably lights his own farts for 'amusement' too.
wbrycem 0
Whoa whoa whoa ... lighting fireworks in the car is one thing, but don't hate on lighting your farts on fire.
inbloom_fml 0
why the **** not? it might've been funny in like, the third grade, but at some point, men have to grow up. and OP: dump him. simple as that. i hope the firework went off in his face and caused significant damage.
dspike65 6
Jesus Christ have you no sympathy or humor? This sounds like a roaringly good drunken adventure. He'll learn his lesson and feel the effects of it in the morning. Let him learn from his mistakes and leave it at that. There is no need to be hasty. Drunk people do dumb things. OP could've seen something stupid happening if she willingly drove a drunk around. FYL but don't make a hasty decision yourself.
ohboyscott 0
make sure he never has babies...please
ASUdec 0
And? How is your life ****** after that? You obviously aren't dead or were in a car accident
xxXChiiXxx 2
Fireworks are LOUD. Especially in small places. She was probably swerving all over the highway, nearly got in a car accident. Not to mention it's an EXPLOSIVE lit in a car fueled by GASOLINE.
Manic_Depressive 0
Imagine the other things she is going to have to deal w/down the road. your just an a**
Nightfallz 0
so where is the fml in this? he lit a firework then what? worst fml I've ever seen
d000505 0
#23, Although it seems that she survived, she was probably scared shitless warranting the FML.
CyclonePsycho 1
Exactly, #41. Fireworks are kind of loud, esp. in small spaces. She probably swerved all over the interstate in a panic and wondering wtf is going on.
lmmmr 0
Vehicles powered by gasoline and explosives are not friends.
AdamGD 0
Well what happened?