Today, I got a splinter in my shop class. The teacher dug at it with tweezers for a while, then told me that my best bet would be to wait until the wound got infected and formed a bunch of pus around the splinter to force it out. It's in my dominant hand's palm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to remove a splinter from one of my roommates. This would have been better if the splinter wasn't deeply lodged in their asscheek. FML
Today, I now know how it feels to have a splinter of wood hammered a full inch underneath your fingernail. FML
Today, I noticed one of my toenails was getting super long, so I cut it. In doing so, I accidentally ripped it off and it started bleeding. As I went to get something to stop it from bleeding, I got a huge splinter in my little toe, causing a painful infection. I think I should just go back to bed. FML
Today, I had to help my dad remove a splinter. From his butt. FML
Today, I cut my finger open with a spoon. After waiting for 4 hours in the emergency room, the doctor told me I was missing too much flesh to qualify for stitches. He then called 2 other doctors in to examine it. Apparently they had a contest for patient with most ridiculous injury. I won. FML
Today, I managed to staple my finger while showing my kindergartner class how to properly use one. FML
Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML
Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML
Today, I finally get to go surfing! On my way out, I got a splinter that’s still way too deep to remove, causing me to cancel the surf day and now it really hurts to walk. FML
Today, I reached for my lip balm while laying in bed in the dark. I accidentally knocked my bedside lamp, and it fell on my hand and shattered. A huge glass fragment impaled my hand. I just got out of surgery. FML
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Top comments
chuka81 27
You have two choices here. You could either listen to your teacher, or go see a qualified doctor.
anthonydpalm 18
Cut your whole hand off OP. Trust me, I'm a doctor.
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Comments (97)
slainbrain 2
it's a splinter....suck it up
Calibeauty_ 13
Try a baking soda paste. Google it
Fmlreadermostly 20
This^
usnwife 18
Make a paste of baking soda and water, cover the splinter and put a band-aid over it. May take a couple days, but it will help pull the splinter out, without waiting for an infection!
cyndasaur 10
Heh. You think that's bad? Index finger. Under the nail. It's still there. Had to break it off with a sewing needle. It's slowly being pushed out by nail growth.
creepyclowntown 10
there are suggestions online on how to get it to pop out enough to tweezer it. I think one is making a baking soda paste. check it out
Rosebudx 32
Run the flat of a sewing needle over the splinter and see if it pops up at all. If it is on the top level of the dermis, it may come partially out or be easily slid out with just a little needlework. If not, it might come out on its own eventually; the body will try to force it out, infection or no. Either way, get some Neosporin on the wound ASAP once it comes out.
DestinyNiya 33
Use a key! The hole that's in the key, use that to try and push it out!
mala_19 20
I waited two days when I had a splinter in my finger, it got infected and the infection pushed it out. Cheaper than the doctor and probably hurts less afterwards. But don't wait too long. There is infected and INFECTED!
yerawizardlizzy 27
Did they cut funding for the school nurse or something?
missymaster 16
Is this actually a thing? I have literally never gone to a school that had a nurse. Teachers have basic first aid but generally if it is worth more than a bandaid they just call the parents ( or ambulance if necessary).
TaoShaman 24
Schools don't have nurses? Mine always did. I always had to go to the nurse at least once. Maybe it depends on the location?
Mortimer14 9
Take a sewing needle (a pin works too but it's shorter). First sterilize it - heat, alcholol, whatever - push the pin under the splinter and lift. Don't worry if it tears the skin, that just makes it easier to grab the splinter. Once you get it to move, you should be able to pull it out. If you draw blood, or if the splinter is in that far already, go to a doctor instead. For those who have posted with splinters under your nails: 1) OW!! 2) pull off the nail and you should be able to grab the splinter. The nail will probably grow back. I've had three (two toes and one finger) nails pulled off only to grow back normally.
sirrubberduckie 37
Are you seriously recommending that people pull their nails off? You realize that's a method of torture for a reason, right?