Today, while at a restaurant, my date shat himself. He spent the entire meal pretending nothing had happened. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I fucked up by trusting the wrong fart and shat myself in the middle of the restaurant I was eating lunch at. I was so mortified, I couldn't even finish the meal I paid for. FML
Today, the waiter farted while I was on a date. My date thought it was me. FML
Today. I went on a date with a really great guy. After the date we went to his place and had drinks in the hottub. I ended up shitting myself. FML
Today, while wearing a sexy pair of undies for my partner and taking him out on a nice dinner, I trusted a fart walking from the car to the restaurant and shit myself. FML
Today, I took this girl out that I've been crushing on for 2 years to a fancy restaurant. At one point during the date, I had to get up to take a massive dump. As I was walking back to the table, a little boy stood up and shouted, "THAT'S THE POOPOO MAN!" in front of the whole restaurant. FML
Today, my date from the night before let me stay behind when he had left for work. While relaxing, I figured I'd be fine to let a little fart out. Unbeknownst to me, not eating enough food over the past few days turned the contents of my bowels to liquid. I sharted on their bed. FML
Today, I went on a first date with the guy I really like. During our dinner, he said he needed to go to the bathroom. You guessed it: he didn't come back. FML
Today, I went on a date with someone I'd met online. Everything was going surprisingly well, until I knocked over my drink, spilling it all over my date's lap. In a panic, I blurted out, "Dude, did you piss yourself?" Needless to say, there will be no second date. FML
Today, I went on a date. I went to the bathroom for five minutes and returned to find my date had not only left, but poured ketchup all over our food to ruin it. FML
Today, I was on a date with my boyfriend when he suddenly got down on one knee and proposed. A waiter tripped over him and spilled our food all over him. FML
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Top comments
HeyItsCamilo 17
im waiting for him to post"today,i shat myself on a date,on the brightside i think she didn't notice"
MitchRapp 20
Sounds like a crappy date.
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Comments (37)
CeejV 15
To be honest, YDI, you could have even been polite, but there was ZERO reason for you to stick around for the whole act.....
Atmey 5
What should've he said? sorry miss, I have to go, but it's not because of you? You;d still take it wrong.
blupenguin29 14
Well don't call him out on it, that's just making a bad situation worse.
Arase7 5
I feel so bad for the guy now.
Storytime17 7
"My God, somebody put shit in my pants!"
Hangryko 32
Why are so many men like this? *facepalm*
DLBL 23
Maybe I am a nitpicker, but I would not sit with Mr. Shittypants for any amount of time, certainly not while eating an entire meal. OP is more polite than I can ever hope to be.