Today, my boyfriend sang "Happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembers the date of the first time he went down on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blow job from me. FML
Today, my boyfriend actually remembered our anniversary. Not our anniversary of being together, which he forgot last month, but the anniversary of him getting his first blowjob from me. FML
Today, it’s my birthday. My boyfriend of almost 4 years completely forgot. FML
Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML
Today, for our anniversary, I sang my boyfriend a heartfelt, self-written song. The first thing he said when I finished was "Your fly is open." FML
Today, my boyfriend forgot our anniversary. But it's okay; I wasn't expecting anything after he forgot my birthday, Valentine's Day, and my name. FML
Today, we were celebrating my birthday and my boyfriend thought it would be funny to shove my face in the cake. While the candles were still lit. FML
Today, my fiancé forgot my birthday. I did however remember to tell him we were sending his mother flowers, for her birthday, which falls a week after mine. We've been together 10 years. I sent her flowers on my birthday. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML
Today, it’s my birthday. Not only did my boyfriend of 5 years forget, when I reminded him, he said very unenthusiastically, “Oh, Happy Birthday.” When I said, “That’s it?” he got annoyed and said,“Well, what else do you want me to tell you?” FML
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Top comments
drawmesunshine 17
In his defense, he didn't play an active role in your birth, making it harder to remember.
fthislyfe 22
Still a better love story that twilight
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Comments (87)
Swiftly 0
Awww...
nabesh 5
Thats why he's not my bf. FYL.
courtneyw32 0
Haha! That sucks
Akharr01 5
Anyways, HAPPY BIRTHDAY
greatinbed 0
#42 I like your nose stud. Um but do you know how to set a profile picture? Because I'm blonde an fb thats my excuse for my ignorance and I can't figure it out..(:
CaptainPickles72 18
Setting your profile picture is a very lengthy process, so be sure that it's what you really want to do. Here are the steps: 1. Make sure the picture of yourself doesn't show the spot where your parents dropped you on your head. 2. Contact the FML Moderators, they'll give you an address that you have to go to. Stan* will meet you there. 3. ??? 4. Go down the alley and make a deal with Stan*, and he'll upload the photo for you. (I'm sure you don't need that soul, badly) 5. Learn how to send a private/personal message. *Satan
Dracoboxer357 36
47- Oh for God's sake, if no one will clue you in, here, this should help: Go to your account page where you wrote up your description and on the bottom left, it says Change Profile Picture. Click that, choose album if you have a picture saved you want to use and select it! It'll upload and more or less, you're done! Okay? Okay. Good luck. :p
greatinbed 0
#114 thanks all theses other bitches are just being smart-asses. Thanks hun(:
Dracoboxer357 36
133- awww, don't judge the others too harshly, it's all in good fun. They just assumed you'd figure it out before they could even answer so they didn't bother. I thought the same thing when you first asked too, earlier. But don't sweat it, I don't mind explaining if it helps the newbies. ;) Cheers.
Leftoverjello 6
He remembers a special occasion that just the two you (and FML readers) know about and likes dining in your fur box? Sounds like a keeper to me.
Bikrbum 6
Wow what at stupid anniversary to remember.
KiddNYC1O 22
Just as significant.
d3sigN8t3dDruNk 1
Haha leave it to a women to vote this down and comment on it. Am i suprised? No. Truth must hurt.
Conasaur 8
At least he didn't sing it in Arabic?
babelord 0
at least you got an early birth day present!!