Today, my family and I were laying on my parents' bed watching a movie. My dad wrapped his arm around me and began rubbing my shoulder. That would have been fine, if it actually had been my shoulder and not my boob. Needless to say, we were both mortified. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was talking to my grandmother, who was lying down on the couch under a blanket watching TV. As I was leaving, I said "See you later Nana," and patted her on the shoulder. Her shoulder was soft, and moved more than I expected. It was her boob. I felt up my grandma. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I took a nap on my couch. She used my arm as a pillow, and everything was pretty peaceful, until she moved over and practically dislocated my shoulder. My screams of pain woke her, which was apparently an "asshole move" on my part. FML
Today, I rested my face against my boyfriend's shoulder while we watched a movie. I didn’t realize he had put Icy Hot on the same shoulder right before I sat down. I cried in pain. He cried with laughter. FML
Today, my dad was on the couch and I sat down next to him. As I was reading a text message, I saw my dad's fat stomach sticking out so I patted it. After the first two pats, I realized I was patting in the wrong place. I patted the family jewels. FML
Today, I went to watch a movie. In the middle of it, I accidentally fell asleep. Minutes later, I awoke on a stranger's shoulder. He was caressing my hair. FML
Today, I was on a date, and I went to put my arm around her, trying to be romantic, but my coordination went straight to hell. Instead of her shoulder, I ended up accidentally grabbing her tit. FML
Today, I was watching TV with my grandpa, and he stopped flipping channels on a movie with a hot naked chick getting oiled down. Suddenly the remote landed on my stomach as my mom and grandma walked in. They yelled at me for being a pervert, while my grandpa sat and chuckled. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with my parents. During a sex scene, my dad covered my eyes. I'm married and have 2 kids. FML
Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML
Today, while at a football game, I had my arm around my girlfriend. We were really close and I was just about to kiss her when suddenly her phone rang. It was her dad, telling her he's watching. FML
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Top comments
fazzems 21
I'd like to unread this ty
12ig12 12
I could just imagine both of your expressions as you noticed. Scared4Life
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Comments (79)
nwwaverider 14
Sounds like a plot to a twisted ****
McHeartAttack 3
*oh yeah*
ladyLALAA 29
Wincest, a game for the whole family!
extremereviews 26
I hope you incested he doesn't do it again
IamComrade 16
Savage
ladyLALAA 29
Hilarious
Herr_Joe 4
So where the details at?
ChaiseT 16
Daughter , dad bonding
vikky538 29
There is no undo for this.
animalxcrackers 20
maybe it's just me, but it's not really all that common for my dad to try to run my shoulders while we're all laying in bed together..
sweetpotato301 7
Idk, when I hug my dad he'll rub my shoulders. Sort of in the way you might do to warm someone up
darksunset00 16
My thoughts exactly....
Joshawott 21
I really hope he didn't try to salvage the situation by saying "You're just like your mother". Actually, for comedy's sake, I do.
thenewgirl29 20
Call me crazy but I never really laid down next to my dad while he put his arm around me. Even if he was aiming for your shoulder, I picture this being awkward.
sweetpotato301 7
It's not weird at all. I hate how so many people on here are trying to sexualise a cuddle with your parents.
jttorkildson 21
A lot of people don't cuddle with their parents, so for us, it would be super creepy if one of our parents touched us that way.
yellowzinnias 20
Good for you 41. That's YOUR experience. Many of us do cuddle with our parents, so don't try to make us into something we're not. I'm 32, and I still cuddle up on a 2-person chair with Uncle (blood uncle I have mentioned before who helped Mother raise me, not uncle mentioned below) when I don't feel well physically and/or emotionally. (He's gay, btw, for all of the pervs out there.)
thenewgirl29 20
Well that is your experience then and shouldn't criticize #41 for having a different one. Idk I don't get why lying next to a family member while they rub your shoulders if you are past puberty sounds like an enjoyable activity.
Mama4ddk 15
I can see where that may be weird for you, I've stated before that my father stopped hugging or even wrestling with me because according to him I grew things. However as an adult with 3 children of my own all over the age of 15 I still take the time to lay on the bed or sit on the couch and cuddle with them while watching TV. I remember missing it when I was a child so I didn't want them to ever wonder when they grow up. Heck, there will probably be still cuddling with me when I'm in a wheelchair and they've put me in a home for dementia LOL.
Whiskey696 3
That seems like something my mom would say.