Today, the kid I was tutoring told me that, "Pirates were a myth. Like the Greeks and Romans." He's 16. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was performing a show about pirates for a youth program. A child started crying because I wasn't a real pirate. A little girl took my defense, saying, "He's a real pirate, his teeth are all yellow!" FML
Today, while at my tutoring job, a middle school kid couldn't find a word in the online dictionary. I told him he could check a regular paperback dictionary. His response was, "That's what you did in your day. That's not what we do in our day." I'm only 19. FML
Today, a parent of one of the students I teach called me to complain that I was teaching her child "lies" and "fairytales". I was teaching them about the Holocaust. FML
Today, I got roasted in class because I could've swore that the story of Robin Hood was in the Bible. I was so cocksure of myself, but I guess I shouldn't repeat stuff my dad told me for a laugh when I was about 9 years-old, now that I'm in college. FML
Today, I had to explain to someone in my class who Gandhi really was and that he was not a fictional goblin. FML
Today, my 24-year-old brother tried to convince me that Hogwarts is real, because there is no way a person could have written that based on imagination. My parents agreed with him. FML
Today, my genius boyfriend was trying to remember a particular island in the Caribbean that was used by pirates in the past. I offered up Morocco. I heard him facepalm over the phone. FML
Today, I told my dad that I was going to sleep over my friend's house this weekend with a few other guys to play Dungeons and Dragons. He responded with, "Oh, back in my day, me and my pals used to pick on the kids who played Dungeons and Dragons." FML
Today, while I was giving a school presentation about life as an injured, deformed soldier, someone asked if the reason I wear an eyepatch is because I'm a pirate. I wouldn't have minded, had I not been presenting to high-school students. FML
Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML
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Top comments
ricardof 19
maybe his education was also a myth
khorstmye 15
And that is why you are there to tutor him.
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Comments (88)
Livin_Like_Larry 29
This isn't just stupid, it's advanced stupid
gearhead369 20
Some people believe crazy things, you just need to educate him. Tutor away!
Bass_Fisher4 7
Hi
martin8337 36
A legend in his own mind.
oobergoober89 16
Try to convince him Obama and Biden are as well
exuberant_orange 17
Looks like you have your work cut out for ya.
stormstarcj 12
Idiot
Colon_Man 17
In Kansas. I wonder if he doesn't believe in oceans, since he's probably never seen one.
HyunnK 18
I thought they only existed in movies and books! @.@
diagnosed 15
I would kindly refer him to history books. Written by renowned people that say that pirates, geeks and Romans were not myths. I strongly suggest that you sent this gentleman straight. And I would probably contact his parents and let them know that his education has really failed
parvus 1
I had a student just like this one last year. I told him that gravity was also a myth ... never saw him again ... I wonder why.
False_Stupidity 42
I hope that this was a joke... Can't tell from here.