Today, I caught a coworker at my new job staring at my chest. Trying not to rock the boat, I took him aside and asked him to stop. He insisted he was just trying to read my shirt. Our company uniforms don't have writing on them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I almost got fired from work because a customer complained that I "threw up gang signs" at him. I was blocking the sun from my eyes. FML
Today, I took my printer to work because the one in my office is broken. When I tried to leave, my boss stopped me and accused me of stealing it from the office. Nobody would believe me when I explained. Now my boss has a new printer. FML
Today, my coworker pointed to our nervous new intern and asked who he was. I jokingly said, "Can't you tell? He's our new slave." I then quickly realized how bad that sounded, given the intern is black. FML
Today, my company was having a huge party so I went to work dressed in my best outfit. During lunch break, my boss said to me, "You really missed out on something yesterday, it was great fun!" FML
Today, I went on a blind date at a fancy restaurant. My date was running a bit late, so I went ahead and got a table. I got bored, so I decided to ask my waiter how I looked. He stood there, then said that, "It's against company policy to mock customers to their face." FML
Today, I was fired for having a haircut that was 'inappropriate for the workplace'. I have alopecia. My boss told me to stop making up excuses. FML
Today, I found out that mishearing my boss and laughing at what I thought he said can make him think I'm high and nearly force me to submit to a drug test. FML
Today, a guy punched me in the subway for staring at his girlfriend. I had dark glasses on, and was fast asleep. FML
Today, I overheard my boss stressing out over finding a replacement for me. I didn't know I was leaving. FML
Today, at the local swimming pool, my friend and I noticed two cute guys had just arrived. When they jumped in, we immediately took off our tank tops and got in the opposite end. They looked over at us, then looked at each other, got out of the pool and left. FML
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Top comments
plaguer 26
Actually a lot of girls get breast reductions because incredibly large breasts can hurt the back.
yuzuhere 21
Maybe he was reading the fine print!
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Comments (86)
mpclaw 3
That's why god gave them to you. Get over it.
pl0xs3rver 45
Well aren't you an entitled chauvinist pig...
aey_bea 2
That's breastual appreciation, my dear. Be glad you're not one of those who end up spending thousands of Pounds for breast enhancement!
Anonymousx3x 4
How is this an FML? If he was your boss, it would suck, but if it's a co-worker, you can yell at him, or tel your boss...
HereToRuinFun 16
God, ignore the people who say that you "must have a nice pair so it's okay". It's not okay for somebody to stare, no matter how big your breasts are, so it's totally okay to tell them to quit it
jaybay3505 8
if a guy is staring, it means you've got a nice set. be proud of them
randybryant799 21
Men look at boobs. They're never going to stop.