Cooked
Today, my boyfriend wanted to make breakfast. Since I usually do all the cooking, I said that was fine. Four hours later, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the sidewalk across the street as the firemen sprayed down the burnt remains of our kitchen. FML
Top comments
Harpy20 24
Was there a spider?
JoshuahColins 19
It's the thought that counts :)
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Comments (79)
xXToxicPenguinXx 12
wtf was he doing for it to go that bad?
ComoEsJuan 24
Fires can start quickly, and get out of hand just as quick.
Lrigglez 7
I can see it now. He went into the kitchen and thought what is this contraption. I think you turn this knob. O look a small flame. I don't think that will cook the breakfast fast enough. Throws some gasoline on it and Um sweet heart lets just go to ihop.
xXToxicPenguinXx 12
#19 I didn't say that fires can't get out of control. I know that. I meant what could have he have attempted to cook for a fire to start.
Scynistr 20
Anything greasy.. Bacon maybe.. Or if the house is messy.. He didn't clear the stove off.. Any number of things.
junkman6 22
"Let me just cook this food with a newspaper on the stove next to the burner." And yes I've seen someone start a fire because they had their news paper on the stove reading it while cooking. They just hit the other knob and lit the burner under the newspaper. People lack common sense and if they normally don't cook or never learned to from someone they can easily burn a house down.
mattrd_fml 31
#56 Gas stoves make flames to cook over.
brenton490 19
I don't question people's ability to cause havoc in the kitchen after my cousin caught my turkey on fire...
Axel5238 29
This is frighteningly true. I had a roommate just out of college that couldn't cook except for hamburgers. He never learned to follow a recipe or other basic things of cooking. It was hard to believe and it seems like guys being clueless about basic need to know things is getting worse.
kuzzy00 22
Here in NZ it's the opposite. Females are the useless ones in the kitchen. I had to teach my ex how to start a vacuum cleaner. FML
zZLightZz 13
The ugly women there must be completely worthless.
Gubbon 17
Cereal.
JoshuahColins 19
It's the thought that counts :)
Wrex 13
He couldn't stand the heat. So he got outta the kitchen
maebelline12 12
Actually cooking is one of the most common ways household fires are started...
foxwasalamb 24
i accidentally started a fire making ramen because i turned on the wrong burner where a ceramic shallow dish of butter was sitting. my family had put the butter there and i didnt notice. butter melted, butter dripped, fire started
solarei 4
OP should've thought of supervision, but like a dumbass she didn't. YDI case closed.
slipstreak 10
Make sure you remember "it's the thought that counts" when someone burns down your kitchen.
Harpy20 24
Was there a spider?
TheDoctor10 28
Not anymore there isn't.
Demig0d6 14
That spider must've been the size of a tic tac
Ali_Br_fml 33
He listened to us and set fire to the spider...what he hasn't anticipated was the amount of damage that the fire would cause... Well, it's not our fault he listened to us...
Greendayfan11 1
This is just awesome
bromeister 6
Next time, go for microwaved pizza.
Rallred32 20
How the **** do you microwave pizza.
colby6666 43
24- With a microwave and lots of love
rivaraven 35
You buy a frozen pizza and put it in your microwave..
Rallred32 20
You need water to microwave food without it creating plasma and exploding, especially with pizza.
hayjay2000 8
No dude, you're stupid. I have microwaved pizza lots of times. If you time it for about 45 second it will be fine. You don't need water.
Rallred32 20
Have you tried to microwave ramen noodles without water?
Han1156 23
That's only ramen
Welshite 40
Oh my god. Seriously, this has to be one of the most intelligence-lacking arguments I've ever had the misfortune to witness. Microwaves use well...microwaves...to cook food. The waves convert water, sugars, and fats directly into energy in the form of heat. Frozen food is chock full of water; dehydrated food is not. THAT is why ramen noodles won't cook.
Axipiter 24
42, please remove the word "hockey" from your profile picture before making assinine comments such as your involvement in this entire thread...
lat1404 16
Hahaha "creating plasma". Physicists have been wasting their time for years. They should have just microwaved a pizza.
sirliam99 12
You actually can create plasma with a microwave just put in a cut open grape or a candle flame and and start cooking
hnick314 5
Actually, microwaves just vibrate polar molecules (see water for instance) at ridiculous frequencies to produce friction heat in the food. Ramen noodles aren't particularly polar so they won't heat. Put water (polar) on them and you're off to the races.
zandalee 20
Is it just me or has the FML community reached new heights of intelligence lately? If you compare the comments between the ones made in 2008 and now, it's really quite astounding...
JKPwnage 27
#24, very carefully
foxwasalamb 24
its the effort that counts guys. mr hockey here is just trying. be patient
gingerface81 16
#46 I love you for that comment, this thread was giving me a headache and you put an end to it
ohSNAPyall 27
You know, you can sprinkle water on leftovers before you microwave them. I do this with fried rice to keep it from drying out when I reheat it.
PengiPou 12
Is nobody going to make a comment on his profile picture being Ron Jeremy?
ryanthecheeseguy 18
This needs a follow up.
MrConcise 35
"Hi, OP here. Everything I own is now a pile of ashes because my boyfriend failed to microwave instant noodles. We're having his IQ tested at the end of the week, because he said, 'I thought putting it in for longer would make more noodles!'"
gingerface81 16
"Hi I'm #15 an decided to put a comment on here that makes me sound inconsiderate to OPs whole situation"
xxthexmisfitxx 25
At least he only burned the kitchen and not the rest of the home? I'm sorry OP! Maybe that's why they say us women belong in the kitchen, because if we aren't it'll be destroyed :P
WordAficionada 19
So you're saying only women are supposed to cook? Wow. The 1900's called, they would like their ideologies back, please.
infernno 23
Thats a fantastic way to piss off the feminists, great job.
hayjay2000 8
I know that was meant as a joke, but you pissed of the mem AND the Feminists
thesmeagol 22
Feminists, only want to be treated equally until it comes to paying the bill or doing hard manual labor.
limabeans101029 21
61- That isn't feminism, it's sexism. Sadly too many people don't realize that they aren't the same thing.
ComoEsJuan 24
61. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, but making one single group the butt of a problem is a joke. All of the 'ism' groups are silly, everyone needs to shut the **** up and get over themselves. No singular group should ever be held as better than any other. Seriously, people are people. ****. Most of what's wrong in the world is caused by people subjegating others based on stupid principles and ideologies. Again, people need to get over their own silly prejudices and shut the **** up and live.
jgwyh 18
Cooking Toast can get out of control
illegalbeagle69 23
If youre cooking toast.. thats gonna be some burnt toast..
LowExpectations 30
Very true #7, I remember once I popped some sliced bread into the toaster like any other morning, and boom! The damn toaster bursts into flames.
False_Stupidity 42
Pretty easy if you don't clean the crumb tray every so often.
LowExpectations 30
I keep my whole kitchen very clean #138. It was just this one time the toaster decided to short out and self destruct.
WordAficionada 19
Damn, that's one way to get fired up in the morning.
ktmla 14
For real I bet OP was hot and very bothered after that experience!
Jbroadbent 4
That's why women need to be kept in the kitchen!
nlm92 15
Hey, as a male, I make a damn fine omelette
MidnaLink 35
Will the guy known as Jbroadbent please refer to #6 and the ensuing argument.
TheDevilWearsJoe 8
As unfortunate as this is, he had good intentions. Atleast no one got hurt.