Anonymous
Fire hazard
Today, my boyfriend thought it was OK for both of us to leave the house with the oven on. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Sick burn
Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML
Un1ucky
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
United States
Cooked
Today, my boyfriend wanted to make breakfast. Since I usually do all the cooking, I said that was fine. Four hours later, my boyfriend and I were sitting on the sidewalk across the street as the firemen sprayed down the burnt remains of our kitchen. FML
burned
United States
Today, my boyfriend was cooking me dinner. He walked away and I decided to help by giving the pan of veggies a sautee flip. My boyfriend failed to mention that he had just pulled that pan out of a 500 degree oven. FML
S. Bauer
Portugal
Today, I yelled at my boyfriend for smoking in the house, because I didn't want the house to smell like smoke. While doing so, I knocked over a candle and lit the couch on fire. FML
anonymous
Fergus, Canada
Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our anniversary. I had cooked him a romantic meal and we were planning on eating it in front of the fire. This would have gone great had I not forgotten to unblock the chimney. My entire basement filled with smoke and didn't clear for three hours. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, my boyfriend gave me a dutch oven, with my own fart. FML
Anonymous
Melbourne, Australia
Cooked
Today, my partner came home late so I preheated the oven for dinner. My partner got home an hour later, and we put things in the oven. We then go to cook the potatoes on our induction stove. Oh, the stove is off, the breaker must have tripped today. Oh, the oven is on the same fuse. Oh, the food is still frozen. It's 10pm. FML
Firequeen
Today I visited my boyfriend's house for Thanksgiving. The fast food from the drive made me really need to poop, so I did my business and flipped on the air vent. Turns out the vent sparked a hot spot in the attic and caused a fire. I literally set my boyfriend's house on fire with my shit. FML
Anonymous
Sweden
Today, the heating in my house broke down. I called my boyfriend and asked if I could stay at his place until I could get it fixed. He said no, and told me my overgrown leg hair would keep me warm. FML
kj1
Draper, United States
Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML
Top comments
RichardPencil 32
It's most likely ok, except your electric or gas bill will be higher. There's an 80% chance your house won't burn down. Relax.
RichardPencil 32
No, there's only a 32.7% chance their house will burn down in five trials. (See binomial distribution.)
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Comments (6)
sarsuela 29
Though it depends on for how long you were gone. I've knowingly left the oven on when it needs to be on for the next two hours but I need to leave for half an hour; it's not like I would have been sitting next to it anyways.
RichardPencil 32
It's most likely ok, except your electric or gas bill will be higher. There's an 80% chance your house won't burn down. Relax.
Marcella1016 32
So if OP does this 5 times, there is a 100% chance her house will burn down at least once?
RichardPencil 32
No, there's only a 32.7% chance their house will burn down in five trials. (See binomial distribution.)
Marcella1016 32
Holy shit. Math and probability trip me the **** out with how crazy it can get. It’s crazy and mind blowing and awesome 😳😱💥 Also - better odds for OP. Still not a bet I’d take though lol. Anything could happen while you’re out and you could end up gone way longer than planned. Better safe than sorry!
RichardPencil 32
Weird stuff, isn't it? Unless they store paper or oily rags on the stove or in the oven, it's very unlikely it would start a fire. It'll certainly add to the utility bill and shorten the life of the appliance.
CRC_101 31
Eh. If you keep the oven relatively clean, it shouldn't be a problem, especially if it's electric. I worry about gas.
BurnInDemonFire 39
It's fine for you to leave. If you want your house to burn down while you're gone. Make sure your insurance is up to date before you go.
samsonity 5
I think your boyfriend missed the days of school where they teach you how to avoid insinuating the house.
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Did you actually do it, or was it caught before no one was home?