Today, I taught my kid how to mow the lawn. It's a self-propelling mower so it's easy to handle. My kid thought it would be smart to tie the handle down so that he wouldn't have to push it at all. This resulted in the lawn mower blasting through our fence and sinking into my neighbor's pool. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weed-whacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgot that I was mowing where the dogs take dumps, I absentmindedly whacked over dog poop… which got flung into my face. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to mow a dick into my grandmother's lawn, but the mower leaked gasoline and now there's a giant dead grass outline. FML
Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML
Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics, I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML
Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML
Today, one of the kids in my neighborhood told me he would mow my lawn for 10 bucks. After a few minutes, I heard the mower stop. He had mowed a penis into my front yard then run away. FML
Today, I agreed to lend my daughter's inflatable pool to my neighbor for the day. Barely an hour later, I witnessed his son jump off their balcony, missing the pool by inches. He's now in hospital, and my neighbor has sworn to sue me, saying I'm responsible because the pool is mine. FML
Today, I thought I would surprise my dad by mowing our entire two acre lawn. When he got home, instead of being grateful like I had hoped, he yelled at me for cutting in vertical lines instead of horizontal. FML
Today, my 6-year-old son pooped in the back yard and used a stick to throw it over the fence into my neighbor's yard. FML
Today, I left my phone outside on the grass while I went inside to get a drink. I didn't expect my dad to run over it with the lawn mower. FML
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Top comments
WhiteCrimson 23
Points for innovative thinking! F on thinking it through first!!!
You_Screwed_Up 7
At least he was trying to be creative in his laziness!
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Comments (105)
ginger20037 5
That actually sounds like something I would have done back when we still had a push mower, now days we have a zero turn mower and I settle for doing donuts in the yard! xD It's strange, I have more fun with the mower then I do my 4 wheeler....
thejimler 9
Nothing ever goes right when a story goes "my X thought it would be smart to..."
ginger20037 5
It's right up there with "Hold my beer!" lol
ccubsfan94 1
mustve been a crappy fence
thecrazymancan 17
Good! He figured out how to make it keep moving indefinetly, now all he needs to do is figure out how to make it turn on it's own.
humanityislost 5
When you buy a new one make him go around cutting everyones yard in the neighborhood for a small fee and pay you back.
MrZsDad 19
Idk the trend in schools these days is to blame the teacher...
devilsnitemare9 8
Was it a rocket powered lawnmower?
destineepanic 5
Work smarter not harder? Lol