Today, my mom went to a psychic. The reason? She has convinced herself that I'm gay, even though I've told her that I'm not, and never have been. The psychic disagreed. Apparently, I'm bi-curious with one of my guy friends. Guess who my mom believes? FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML
Today, my mom reached the lowest point of her midlife crisis. She convinced herself she's psychic and grounded me for something she "knows" I'm going to do. FML
Today, my mom called me into the living room to say that she had something important to tell me. She then explained how she and my dad had "talked things over" and wanted me to know that they accept me and love me no matter what. Apparently my mom thinks I'm lesbian. I'm not. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother insisted she's not homophobic, but however people only 'turn gay' because they were sexually abused, or are 'making it up to get attention'. She informed me I'm the former and my girlfriend is the latter. Uh huh. FML
Today, my mum decided that me being bisexual meant that I was "deciding whether or not to be a lesbian" because supposedly, no man will have me. Thanks mum. FML
Today, I found out that my mother has been telling everybody that I’m a lesbian, because both of her best friends have at least one gay child each, and she was feeling left out. This explains why people have been treating me differently the last few weeks. FML
Today, I was leaving to go over to a friend's and my parents suddenly ask if I'm gay. I reply that no, I'm bisexual. My mom then asks if I've ever made out with someone of the same sex and I say yes. She turns to my dad and says 'I told you so. You owe me $20'. My parents bet on my sexuality. FML
Today, at a mall, my mom accused me of lying about being gay, just because I said I don't like shopping. FML
Today, my mom asked me, once again, if my girlfriend of almost a year is just a cover up for being gay. FML
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Top comments
chocogatto12 3
Psychics are frauds. They only tell you what you want to hear
AdamGD 0
Wow... Your mom is a freak (no offense). Seriously? She goes to a phychic to find out if you're gay?? Even though you said you werent? I wonder what she would have done if the phychic said you were straight? Would she have consulted a nuerologist??
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Comments (175)
zombzomb 0
maybe you should stop having anal
cjp767 0
same thing happened to me... by the way, what are you wearing?
Brandon15 0
Who gives a **** of what your mom thinks
Angry_Dad 0
The only thing I found funny about this post was that he said "I'm not and never have been."
fegd 0
Maybe you are.
princesskitten 0
If my mom called me a lesbian, refused to believe me when I denied it, and then went to a ******* PSYCHIC about it, of all things, and believed an old lady with 3 inch fingernails and a turban over me, I'd refuse to claim her as my mother ever again. That fact that she went to a psychic to find out if you were gay says a lot about her intelligence. No offense to you, but your mom is an idiot.
orangecrsh16 0
I don't know who she believes, why are you asking me?! Who do you think i am, a psychic?!
Uvula 0
I hate when fmls ask questions in the readers POV its not cool.
derriduh 0
It could be worse. You could be the flake of the family instead of your mom.
amylol_fml 0
the fact that you said "guy friends" just proves you really are gay....