Today, my boyfriend, who moved in about a month ago, decided he wanted to move back out. Why? Because I don't keep my place clean enough for him. This, coming from the same man who refuses to wash or clean anything because "that's what women are for." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out why my boyfriend of over a year is so obsessed with cleaning his entire place before I come over. He's been hiding the ex-girlfriend who never moved out. FML
Today, my boyfriend is mad at his landlady because she hasn’t followed through yet on the new front door she promised a month ago. He, on the other hand, has neither cleaned the toilet, nor washed any dishes since he moved in. Which was… a month ago. FML
Today, I went home with the guy I’ve been casually seeing. His place was a disgusting pigsty so I made an excuse to leave. Later he texted me, ending things. Online I saw him bitching about how no one can pass his “girlfriend test” and that a real woman would happily clean for her man. FML
Today, I explained to my man child of a boyfriend that we don't reuse dirty dishes. We have to wash them. He doesn't think it's gross and yelled at me, throwing the pan in the sink. Oh, he also refuses to wash dishes. FML
Today, I moved out a few weeks ago because I was sick of my husband not helping around the house, and told him he’d never manage without me. I checked today while he was at work. The house is the cleanest I’ve ever seen it; apparently he doesn’t need me and most of the mess was actually mine. FML
Today, my boyfriend got upset after I politely asked him to do the laundry. He takes every chance he gets to act macho and brag to people about how he's in the Marines, but apparently he is too much of a pussy to act like a man and clean his own clothes. FML
Today, my boyfriend was tidying up around the room. I asked him if he'd like me to help, to which he responded, "No, I don't need any help," then added, "Wish you weren't so lazy." FML
Today, my boyfriend of 8 years moved in with two other women. He's spent the past 2 years telling me he can't afford to move out of his parent's house. FML
Today, while on vacation, I found out that my boyfriend moved out. He had claimed that he couldn't come with me because his boss messed up his time off request, and for the last two days he said he'd been "cleaning". FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm "high maintenance." I'd only asked him to use deodorant and brush his teeth. He hasn't had a shower in over a week. FML
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Top comments
LovesSushi 25
Count your blessings that it only took a month of living together to find out what a douche canoe he is.
mk58 31
Good riddance.
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Comments (155)
Ashamed_Sister 60
Why you didn't leave him already?
Fmlsea 28
unless he is paying all your bills whats stopping him from cleaning? he has two arms & a heartbeat . beside when living together cleaning should be decided equally its not fair for him to sit on his butt while you clean all of it
Fmlsea 28
*divided
monnanon 14
sometimes households naturally fall into a pattern where one person does more than the other. this can be because one is bothered more by mess or is at home more. in an ideal world it would be equal but it doesnt always work. i do agree that both sides should be doing something around the house. we only divide up cooking and dishes equally and the other things are done by who has the time.
snufflebubble 13
Yes, but having said that, it is also true that in no way should either party blatantly refuse to not contribute. It isn't fair for him to place the role solely in her hands. If it was something that happened naturally over time-this would be a different story, but it isn't, and therefore he's a just being selfish.
israelnotjacob 20
Yeah agreed. I think the other poster was simply saying that realistically random household chores seldom are divided perfectly equal because there are so many little things that cause it to not work out that way (one person caring more, being home more, other projects one is working on, etc.). But you're right, it's a completely different thing when one side completely refuses to do certain jobs ever insisting that's solely the responsibility of the other person. That is completely wrong.
shitsville 13
why are you saying "FML"? it should be "oh yay! now i can find a BF that's better than a subhuman arsehole!"
heyred 11
You didn't know his opinion on this before he moved in? I would think that you would have known and accepted your due if you knew him well enough to move in. YDI.
420Zombie 17
sometimes moving in with a person is what it really takes to show you that person's true colors.
G97Alex 21
Which in this case is brown. Like poop. Because he's a piece of shit.
snufflebubble 13
Erghh. Regardless of gender, relationship status or age, everyone in the household should pitch in. The fact that he's your boyfriend makes the situation that much worse. He should want to help you and respect your house that he is now living in.
buddy51 23
OP- this seems less like a fml and more like a "make my life a lot better by getting this spunk weasel of a pseudo bf out of my life"!! I suggest cleaning one more time and dumping his crap in a pile on the sidewalk out front, changing the locks and counting your blessings!! Cut him off, OP, cut him off now!!
allmidnighteyes 11
At least now you know you're with a misogynistic little shit?
abhi95 31
Thank god this happened before you got married! Then all you'd get is an fml much higher in magnitude... Oh wait... I guess it's worth it!
tishtashbat 16
If he won't clean or wash anything, who keeps his place cleaner than yours? His mother or a girl roommate stupid enough to clean up after him?? Also, if you've heard him say 'that's what women are for' why would you ever agree to move in with him??
limitedition 25
You're sad about him moving out why??