Today, I walked to the end of my driveway to pick up the newspaper. I read the front page that was talking about people who have been getting hurt from slipping on ice. Laughing about that thought and walking up my driveway, I slipped. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I walked outside to get the newspaper and slipped on the icy driveway. Because I was wearing boxers and a robe, my legs got all scraped up. After much cursing, I got the paper and went inside. The headline read "Caution: Icy Conditions". FML
Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML
Today, I tried to walk on the sidewalk. Actually, it was so slippery that I had to shimmy across it. Then I shimmied too quickly and fell down. Now everything hurts. Maybe next time I should bring a sled. FML
Today, while walking to my bus stop, I saw a girl slip on black ice, then catch herself, and I laughed because people catching themselves slip are hilarious. I reach the same patch of black ice and go flying, falling on my hip and spilling my coffee all over me. FML
Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. It wasn't all that embarrassing, until I walked two more feet and slipped again. The second time, a man pulled over and loudly asked if I was drunk. FML
Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML
Today, as I was walking home, I felt my feet slip out from under me and I face-planted in the slushy, dirty, melting snow. I rolled over, completely soaked, and attempted to get up, thinking no one saw me. A mail-man then passed me without offering to help, and said, "I've seen worse." FML
Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML
Today, I slipped on my icy front porch, fell back, and hit my head on the step. I tried to get up, but lost my balance and fell halfway into the bush next to the steps. I then looked up to see my very hot, British, ex-Special Forces next door neighbor laughing so hard he dropped his snow shovel. FML
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Top comments
shamille 5
irony win?
jamila123 5
R u laughing at yourself?
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Comments (81)
iam_fuck_life 0
ydi.
totem_fml 0
I bet your fat as hell huh.
lovingamylea 0
@totem you mean a skinny person can never slip and fall? it'll do you good to do a little less judging.
alexandraa_fml 0
The quantum force of the gravity times multiplex fathoms pushing down on a fat person causes inertia at mass capacity times neurons to make fat people more vulnerable to slipping on ice. Its very simple actually.
lovingamylea 0
@alexandraa are you trying to make yourself sound intelligent by using random complex terms? I'm not a physicist but I do have a science background and "mass capacity times neurons" makes no scientific sense considering neurons are the cells in your brain. Grow up and stop targetting fat people. As though they don't have enough issues of their own already.
alexandraa_fml 0
Well let me just stand up straight and adjust my tie, I forgot this is the no fun zone. Everything said must be taken seriously to the tenth degree. Jeez.
Fire_Starter 0
Lovingamylea: What the hell are you even doing on this site? Alexandraa: Your first post equals absolute brilliance. ******* hilarious. OP: The front page article is a story of people slipping on ice? That's truly a sad newspaper. And I thought the one in my town was bad... [FireStarter]
alexandraa_fml 0
Well thankyou, atleast someone appreciated it :)
akotus 0
Lol well said, and I've studied science for a long time, and all they said was random terms
perdix 31
@28. I liked it, too, alexandraa. I know enough physics that what you said is TECHNICALLY BS, but I have enough of a sense of humor to suspend disbelief and laugh at it. You should see what happens to some of these tight-asses when you speculate about facts not in evidence. They pounce on you like we're in a court of law and not at a supposed entertainment site.
lovingamylea 0
@alexandraa, and everyone else: I thought it was funny too, until I got to the part that mocked fat people -then I just thought it rude. If you had said "... (your funny nonsense) would have made them equally vulnerable..." people would have still found it funny. No, I'm not fat and I'm in the perfectly healthy weight range, thankyouverymuch. I just don't think it's fair for people to mock fat people. How come underweight people never become the target even though so many of them look like they have an eating disorder? We're not all perfect. You wouldn't want people to be targetting your explosive acne/ small ****/ big nose/ whatever else problems you have. Do unto others if you would have them do unto you.
alexandraa_fml 0
Jackster1020, that was good I lol'd, haha. Lovingmyamylea- Underweight people do become the target of mockery? Anyones slight imperfections gets them knocked, but you learn to either drown in sorrow, ignore it or find the humor in it. It was an obvious joke I would think to most and I only referred to fat people because I was going off what #15 said. In its obvious vague humor I didnt expect anyone to take any part of it serious = not trying to be hurtful. perdix- Tell me about it! I'm now beginning to see that. :/
V_S234 0
Hahaha I love when people fight about scientific laws. :)
jennyu 0
jennyu 0
Although i agree that it is rude and mean to discriminate, to make assumptions and to "pick on" larger people, i thought i would say, this is going to sound silly, that neurons arent just brain cells. There are millions and millions of neurons all over your body. Thought i would clear that up. :) :)
infinitii 0
karma kicked your ass
maddieguinn 0
YDI
Thabb 0
What goes around comes around. I feel like an dork saying that but this is proof it's true.
FOOFIGHTERSrock 0
First things first.....ur the idiot for laughing y othe peoples funny problems, and this is no fml :D
mikaylaaaaa 7
Tht is a FML?
jamila123 5
R u laughing at yourself?
shamille 5
irony win?
NotVeryOriginal 0
Irony!
fullyhalfempty 0
He who laughs first never laughs last.
Spandexhero 0
he doesn't deserve it, but this doesn't really FYL, just a bad case of irony.
farflungfloyd 0
Wow... talk about Hubris.
Mervyn 0
Instant karma!
NotVeryOriginal 0
Double Irony! #2 calls the OP an idiot but, their post is full of fail!