Today, while working as a police dispatcher, I took a call for a motorcycle accident that occurred near my house. After obtaining all the essential information I realized the rider was my brother. He doesn't own a motorcycle, but I do. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while at work at a new job, my brother comes and takes my car. Along with all my money, my phone, and whatever else I had in my purse. His message to me through one of my co-workers was "walk home." FML
Today, I was told I have a brother… By a stranger in a parking lot, while leaving my grandfather's wake. FML
Today, my friend called me at work to tell me that someone had hit my motorcycle and that it was in pretty bad shape. I chuckled and waited for the "April fools" that would follow. A picture of my wrecked bike came instead. FML
Today, I found out that while I was on vacation my neighbor had let my brother into my apartment. I don't have a brother. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and I saw my brother on the other side of the road. He lives overseas and always told me he would visit when I least expected it. When I saw him, I got so excited I jumped on his back, screaming his name. It wasn't my brother. FML
Today, I was driving my motorcycle, and I noticed someone was in the ditch, so I went to go help them. When the ambulance showed up, they ran over my bike, totaling it. FML
Today, my older brother called me in the middle of the night to describe to me, in painstaking elaborate detail, the Yamaha commercial he'd just watched. FML
Today, my brother called me up. He said he needed to talk to me. Whenever someone says that, I naturally I get nervous. He said, "I gave one of my friends your number." I was shocked and asked why. "Your life makes me sad." FML
Today, I pulled my motorcycle into a wheelie when my crush drove by. She was the one who drove me to the hospital when I went over backward. FML
Today, after I just finished a 16-hour double shift, my brother asked me to ride with him to do an Instacart. While delivering these people’s groceries, his car overheated and oil light came on. He had no money, so I had to fix and pay for the parts. FML
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Top comments
alexh15 13
I see some family friction in the near future...
CaliGali 9
Hope he's ok OP things can be replaced but brothers can't.
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Comments (127)
justpeachy5 0
So you cared more about your motorcycle being damaged than 'Oh, my brother may be hurt...' ?? O.o
br0ccoli 15
He went from cool to injured in 10.5 seconds.
buddy565 7
Wow. Screw the motorbike. Your brother just got in a motorbike accident. He could have died. And all u care about is the bike.
baby_frenchie 6
Man, I'd almost kill that dude. The fact is he took your bike without asking and wrecked it. You better tell him to pay it all back.
isis_morrigan 18
This is a situation in which you are entirely justified in telling him "bro, you are going to wish that bike wreck had killed you by the time I'm done with you!" and proceed to beat his ass, repeating on a routine basis.
SAgirl 23
I hope he pais for the damages...
NIRVANA1990s 1
looks like somebody's investing in a new bike.
Mcstud1y 30
Sue him
iwin8166 13
Being a rider and motorcycle owner. I know I would still love my brother but there is a huge ass beating in the near future for him. I've spent too may hours and too much money on my bike to let some prick steal it and wreck it without consequence.