Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his friends as his "sex partner." FML
Today, I hooked up with a friend. I expressed an interest in it becoming something more. He expressed an interest in not telling anyone and pretending it never happened. FML
Today, while meeting a new client, their assistant said I looked familiar. Before my brain could stop me, I blurted out, "I do porn." FML
Today, I was having a good talk with a coworker and I was excited that I've made my first friend at work. After sharing some stories and some laughs he asked if I had a boyfriend. I said I do. He asked if I was always faithful, I said I was. He then walked away. FML
Today, I introduced my long-distance boyfriend of 2 years to my friends. I told him how my friends jokingly call him my imaginary Internet boyfriend. He thought it was so funny that when they met, he claimed to be my cousin, saying that I paid him to pretend to be my boyfriend. They believed him. FML
Today, I was introduced to friends of my boyfriend as, "My other girlfriend." FML
Today, my boyfriend introduced me as a friend to one of his friends. FML
Today, a client stared at me in disbelief after I mentioned that I had a boyfriend. FML
Today, after weeks of therapy for severe depression, my therapist thought it would be helpful to confess my deepest problems to my friends, to prove that it was alright to trust people. I did. They laughed. Hard. FML
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
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Top comments
wanijima 0
I do things like that sometimes, but joking about an awkward subject to try and make things less awkward? Uh... YDI, imo.
narcoticjunkie 0
hello, I'm a drug addict.
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Comments (106)
DJ_Chutfield 4
You're a girl, why would you introduce yourself as a sex addict? Guys are already only interested in looking at your ****, doesn't really help when you make them picture you naked on all fours when you're just meeting them.
Darkhumor 0
This^ Win! Tho I doubt she had all that much self respect in the first place. Or respect from anyone else now that we all know her lying and bad jokes problem. "Hi my name is ______ and I have a bad jokes problem" Doc: I prescribe watermelons and pumpkins "Really? How would that help?" Doc: Oh I didn't mean eat them, apply liberally to skull with considerable force until problem solved!
Immature_fml 0
you're a soulless ****. some people have issues and you make fun of them? As an ICEBREAKER? You're an idiot...
Bathory_fml 0
I think you got trolled, lady.
purple91 8
You sound like a prude.
xsummiex 0
YDI for being awkward around new people. Sorry OP ;/
Cmaj7889 0
tht was pretty dumb
phishophobia 0
are you a sex addict? it's okay you can tell me.
Cabz2018 0
ydi...
tb15 0
I don't think it's accurate to compare sex and **** addiction to drug addiction.
serenaaaa_fml 0
YDI. I feel bad for the other kid