Today, I'm at work on a construction site for a high rise building, on the 12th floor today. I've developed a severe case of the runs, causing me to need to rush to the nearest toilet periodically. Luckily for me it's conveniently located on the ground floor. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML
Today, I have horrible diarrhea because of IBS. If I was at home, this wouldn't be that big of an issue, but I'm at work and I don't have access to a bathroom all the time. I also found out I have about 10 minutes to get to the toilet or else I'll probably shit myself. FML
Today, I have a huge meeting with the big executives of the company I work at. I have to be there in 10 minutes. I'm stuck on the toilet with the runs because I thought it would be a good idea to eat hot chicken wings last night. FML
Today, I had to shit worse than I thought possible at work. I left my desk and hurried towards the bathroom, dropping trou as soon as the door closed. I then tripped over my pant leg, hit my head on the toilet, and came to some minutes later with my ass spewing diarrhea like a volcano. FML
Today, I'm severely hungover. Upon returning home, I came to find that both of the elevators were out of order. I live on the 12th floor. FML
Today, I found out that a water pipe at my work had burst over the weekend. There is absolutely no water in the building, including the bathrooms. It's a 9-hour day, and I took a laxative this morning before I came in. FML
Today, I worked construction building a hotel. I was taking out the trash when I suddenly felt an extreme urge to poop. I ran into one of the rooms and found an empty cardboard box to poop into. Finished, I closed the box and made my way to the door. I then saw my boss staring at me from the closet. FML
Today, I had to take an urgent dump at work. I noticed too late there was no toilet paper left, so I had to risk doing a quick "pants around the knees" shuffle to the next stall. I locked eyes with the window cleaner at the same time I heard someone enter from behind me. FML
Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML
Today, I realized I'm too short to use the urinals at work. FML
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Top comments
PleaseStayChill 9
Go off of the building. I'm sure everyone on the ground would enjoy that.
Schizomaniac 24
How is it convenient if y- Oh. Well damn. Guess you have two cases of the runs then.
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Comments (56)
iLuvsIt 10
So you are sick, not productive, possibly contagious (with gastroenteritis) and by the sounds of it barely making it to the toilet - go home you twat. Go home, get a massive jug of fluids and get your stinky butt into bed.
Shade1982 21
To be honest, I've seen working conditions where the only accepted reason to call in sick was if you couldn't walk anymore. I once had a very long discussion about this with my boss. According to him, anyone capable of still standing on two legs would also be capable of getting to work. I never managed to convince him of the incredibly dangerous situations you could get...
The_F3rris 11
Should have called in sick or something.
Brssps 13
That sounds like a shitty situation
desertpunk75 11
Incoming...
SexyMexi21 23
I work the trade and buddy.. I would call in sick till you feel better. them shutters don't get changed until every Tues or Thurs. sorry fella.
raphdragon02 8
butt plug